Sheila On 7-Dan

dan... dan bila esok, datang kembali, seperti sedia kala dimna kau bisa bercanda dan, perlahan kau pun lupakan aku, mimpi burukmu, dimana tlah ku tancapkan duri tajam, kau pun mengis , menangis sedih, maafkan aku, dan... bukan maksudku, bukan inginku, melukai mu sadarkah kau disipun ku terluka,melupakan mu, menafikan mu, maafkan aku, lupakan lah saja diriku,bila itu bisa membuatmu, kembali berpijar seperti dulukala, caci maki saja diriku bila itu bisa membuatmu, kembali berpijar seperti dulukala........lupakan lah aku..........

i've been waiting

this morning..... after saho, finished my korean drama marathon.... all night i watched the drama Hello Miss and i finally finished it this morning.....it was a really great drama, especially in the plot of the series..... i enjoyed the acting of lee dae hae and lee ji hoon..... both of them really made the drama seemed almost real.. well finished another drama and another two to go....i intend to finish each before raya and before SPM......haiya.... not long before SPM... a few weeks to go.... i haven't really study or anything.. but with high hopes i might study hard with a little encouragement from everyone.... "i Will Succeed in my SPM" and so i will... i'm starting to study and i'm improving a lot in my exam and i hope that with each starting day my brain will let up more energy for my studies, and plus i promised someone hat i will study hard and excel or at least pass all my paper.......its just that in all the commotion i haven't really had any chances to let off some steam, although the drama really helped a little my stress level is really at a peak point and i can go craz anytime before the real thing.... just hope that i will somehow find a miracle in life and inspiration to work harder....plus i didn't think anyone would care anymore if i succeed or not... i will always be a dissapointment to my family and my friends.... and just no matter how hard i try nothing will ever be enough.........wished rudy was here to help me....why did he have to go so far......posa will end likely the next week so in a ny case i wanted to wish everyone a HAppy Raya....this year will meybe be the most boring raya i will star to celebrate.. as i had said no rudy no fun, we always spent raya together and when he's not here there won't be anyone to do stuff with, no DD's house, no fireworks, no fun, no money, and espesially no companion this year... i wouldn't want to spend my raya with thing....he's way to boring and plus he's weird and i don't really like him.......just hope this raya will be fun and i will remembered to not to neglect my studies too............such a crazy year, what i wished i would want to skip it and yet i don't want some of it to be skipped.......well so in short i want to end this post with my hopes and dreams high, and it will end today