My Lost In the Post

Baby we can stay fly a G6

2011-04-26T03:51:00.001-07:00

alrite. its been soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long since i've updated this blog. i think the last time i've updated this is last year, before i started or was it after i finished my practical training at SESCO. well anyway, a lot have happened since i last updated.

so anyway, right now, i'm waiting for my offer letter to enter this local university. i hope i get in, cause if i don't, then i'm in a lot of trouble in the job department.

so i think thats it for my latest updates. bye

"Shop the streets of Tokyo get your fly kicks, girl you always in my mind, got my head up in the sky feeling priceless, yeah where we at only few have known, waltz to next level Supermario, i hope this works out, Cardio. till then lets fly geronimo!"

YO!

2010-11-02T08:09:00.001-07:00

`hey listen. i just started my practical training. so i may have more than enough time to update my blog, in any case just be sure to check them out.

i guess

2010-10-22T04:45:00.000-07:00

i'm no pinochio. but i'm also no prince charming.

Transparent

2010-09-02T10:37:00.000-07:00

its transparent. but unfortunately its not the literal meaning. its just metaphorically.

the girl. gone.

the plan. ruin.

the future.bleak.

the friends.same.

the parents.controlling.

the relationship status. single forever.

the status of my heart morale. very bloody LOW!!

whatever happened to the high spirited boy, its gone now. :(

"wouldn't even matter if we live on different planet, you know i'd steal a rocket ship and teach myself to land."

somehow i feel so abandoned

2010-08-29T11:12:00.000-07:00

to tell you the truth, i never wanted to post anything on this blog about my personal life and shit. but when it comes to wanting to express myself, i just need to do it right away. this blog may not have many reader, but this could be for my future reference.

anyway, i'm not very good with how people say social skills, this is due to my mother's strict upbringing. like i didn't know how to talk to a girl until i was 12, and that was thanks to a movie known as American Pie. thats right, i am thought the social skill through a movie. so skip a few years, dated a few girl without anyone knowing, and finally now.it has come to the point where i took the liberty to adopt the style of one Barney Stinson, from the tv series How I Met Your Mother. his philosophy of bro's and such, and never bring a girl to meet your parents, or even your friends, and making a girl think your somebody else(although i perfected the skills way before i watched that show.) . so at this point i'm thinking that dating a girl is fine, making friends with a girl is fine. but having a very serious relationship with them is another thing.

the THING ABOUT GUYS, no matter how much they say they love and miss their girl, behind their sweet loving face is another face that wants to miss some other girl. some guys manage to pull this off,some are unfortunate, and some like me, just don't seem to care about what the other girls feel, meaning they tell their girlfriends that the are seeing some other girl. after all honesty is always the best policy.

so right now i'm thinking that i'm single, but i'm not going into the relationship thing again, since the last time i fell for this girl, it turned out really weird, for me, and maybe for her too.

just pointing out that if i do find the right girl, i'm gonna evaluate her first, get to know if she really does like me, and make sure that her friends don't find out about me.

i guess i'm ending my post here. and until further notice, i'm gonna continue writing stuff and shit . so goodluck if you are reading this, and have a nice day.

"and everytime i close my eyes, i could see you standing in front of me."

How Dreams are Crushed. How Fantasy is just a Fantasy.

2010-08-17T07:44:00.000-07:00

okay. this is it. my post about movies. Crappy game adaptation and/or cartoon adaption into live action film.

The first movie that crushed my dream.

Transformers 2 (revenge of the fallen)
to tell you the truth, i'm not a big fan of Transformers. i'm just a fan of the toys, cause back then it was the only toy that i could play with that is a combination of two things. its a car that can turn into a robot. its like getting a 2 toys for the price of 1. anyway, heres how i think it is.

The movie lacks plot. i mean the first movie seems ok, not great, its okay, since its a first time film, plus it hints a sequel at the end, so curiousity killed the will to think the movie is crap. the sequel, it just blows. no character development, no plot. and of course a huge budget targeted into making fireworks(special effects). sure the effects were the best one i've seen in years, but believe me, good story plot is what i want. i mean so far, the best movie that i still think is the best would be LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY. no matter what you say about it. i mean come on. Michael Bay is one of Hollywoods leading Director, and he got the best cartoon/Toy franchise, and turned it into SPECIAL EFFECTS PERFORMANCE. the movie is by far in my worst movie list. theres no word to describe how ridicolous that movie is. if anyone is a fan of the film, explain what the movie is about actually.

Last Airbender
my favourite Nickleodeon cartoon, next to spongebob.
when i first watched the cartoon, it was the best thing in the world to me. when i watched the live action movie, i'm not sure it is the same thing anymore. the only way for you to like this movie is by actually not knowing there is a cartoon show by the name of Avatar: The Last Airbender. Shamalayan thought he could cram the whole season(Book 1:water) into an hour an a half movie. its okay if only the character were believable. theres no emotion. theres no comic relief(Sokka's Character, and occasionally Aang). what a piece of dissapointment. if they could remake the movie, i would suggest giving book 1 with 2 parts. at least they could make more money with that, and the plot would be less crammed, and the character won't be jumping from one side of the world to another side of the world. the plot is ok. but it was just too crowded. Shamalayan, to me, is a great director, he introduced me, to the word "plot twist". his movies at first were thought to be unpredictable, but as time moves, it became predictable. but the twist is better with each movie. I like the Sixth Sense, The lady in the water, etc. but this adaptaion of Avatar is just not right. he wouldn't be doing the world any good, by making this movie. I was FREAKING DISSAPOINTED WITH THE FREAKING MOVIEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DragonBall:Evolution
Best comic in my list, next to One Piece, GTO, and my collection of Malaysian Comic.
THE REASON THIS MOVIE IS NOT GOOD:(spoiler alert)
1. Goku doesn't have tail
2. it is set in America, or somewhere in the WEST
3. Shen Wong is some kind of evil entity that wants to destroy the world.
4. No Kurin/Kirillin.
5. for some reason, no mention of Saiyan race or Saiyan warrion is in the movie.

Tekken
im in no mood to say why i hated this movie most.
if you played the game you know why. okay to be honest I AM GOING TO SAY WHY IT SUCKS REALLY BAD.
1st, JIN KAZAMA is raised by his granfather Heihachi Mishima because he inherited the Devil Gene. and his mother did raised him but was killed by OGRE. not KAZUYA.
2nd, wheres the rest of the character from tekken 1, 2 , 3, 4. somehow, Miguel, Christie, and Sergei is in it. and why is steve fox old, and why did Eddie have no connection to Christie?
3rd, WHERE IS HWORANG AND KING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? Paul Phoenix get beaten by Marshall Law. STEVE FOX IS THE SON OF NINA WILLIAM!!!!!!not a retired BRITISH BOXER.

okay this isnt movie REVIEW.
its just me complaining about the movies not in line with its original sources. if you want to make a movie based on the a source, follow the source. if you don't follow the source, might as well make your own movie.

"i'll take it one day there will be no more movies."

I'm Here, I'm Back. and with nohting to do. i write.

2010-08-16T10:32:00.000-07:00

so here i am again. for the time being, its the first entry in the month of Ramadhan. and entering the second week pf fasting. to tell you the truth, i'm kinda gaining weight during this month for no apparent reason, since fasting means you eat less, and skip meals for the whole daytime. but whatever. i could care less.

and for some reason, i've developed my writing skills to reduce my usage of dots. get that? see, no more long dots between sentences. hahahaha.

and precisely talking about that, someones been using the dots too many time in his writing, more accurately, his text. what do you think using dots as a way to emphasize how your words should be? its okay if its followed by another words, but to only put one word, and then end it with a lot of dots is just stupid.

i like to ramble in my blogs because i never get to ramble in real life. its really fun, everyone should try it. its the internet, chances are anyone that you know would read this is a million to one. but chances they'll open that link in your facebook page is pretty high. (it happened to me last year)

so in the spirit of my sriting wisdom coming back, i'll try to finish whatever i'm starting . so here's to a new beginning, and the start of something grand i hope.

"to tell people the truth that you hate them is harsh, but its life"
-Me (2010)

morning glory...

2010-03-23T07:49:00.001-07:00

i want her to be my morning glory...so much.... if you're reading this, i wanted to become something more...

when will i ever see you again

2010-02-28T03:36:00.000-08:00

over and over again.

do you sometime get that feeling, you know, when you feel bad for no apparent reason? well if you do then you do... i don't get it at all....

the dissapearing boy

2010-01-15T02:47:00.000-08:00

i'm regretting. regrets are never good. so i'll just forget it.

anyway, seems its already been 2 month, i haven't said a word to her. its not cause i'm mad or anything, its just that, i don't know, i dunno what i'm doing anymore... am i really going to get over it just like this? cause no matter what, i'm eventually gonna meet her.. its as if i don't know.

she has her own things going on. but if theres one thing i know that i want to do, is that i'm never falling for someone again. cause the fact is, there is never a true love....i've been hurt much too much already, not by her, but by some other girl before her.....and yeah i look fine but guess what i'm never gonna be fine.

its something thats gonna stay forever, it never slips out of my mind, but whenever its the main thing inside my head, i try to laugh myself to try not to think about it.

the truth is, guys that are honest are a dime a dozen, and some that looks good and are honest at the same time are harder to find. i'm not saying i look good, i don't. i'll never will.....but now people only choose the faces right? personality, and everything too.... cause if you're lucky, you'll find the one thats always good to you even when you're not good.....but the fact is that nobody even freaking cares anymore....

i'm just rambling random stuff here, and i'm not making sense...don't ever believe in true love....if love doesn't even exist, how can there be true love right? hahaha
theres a word for people who don't believe in god, they are known as atheist, i don't believe in love, what do you call it?

get you're edward cullen, and your prince charming, and try to find them, they're not real, but you'll get em anyway, closer than resemblance, feelings not the same, i hope they are true, cause the truth is, guys don't really love girls, they're just playing with em. i've heard hundreds of stories of how a girl got broken by a guy, and guess where they start at? lovey-dovey feelings from every point of time, calling in every minute, and they always say that this is true love.. as if, three month laters they're fighting calling each other whore and bitches, and sluts...and lastly they were not together again.....i've heard them all before. no guy will ever love a girl truely...even me....yes its true....

"a love poem is nothing noone can really give, its just a poem, theres no love... emotion makes em love... fuck that..."

Loser Lullaby

2009-12-10T17:38:00.000-08:00

officially, i'm a loser. no further cynical remarks or sarcasm. she is the one. i could feel it.

she could be her....ow a

2009-12-06T06:57:00.000-08:00

hmmmmmmmmm

i don't know anything, i haven't talked to her in days. taking and advice from a friend, i should just leave her alone.

i want to stop thinking about her, but i couldn't. i wish i could, thats why i've been keeping myself busy for a while, going out and other stuff. but everything that i do, i can't stop thinking about her..... dear god... i just can't. now more than ever.

i think she already found someone to be with her, i'm praying that the guy is me, but what are the chances right? i've got a better chances of getting a car than being with her. i know what i am. hahaha

but with anything, i'm not giving up that easy. until i'm sure i'm over her... which means never ever. i can handle rejection, but the thing is, i haven't been rejected, cause i haven't confessed anything to her myself.

i might not be that good looking ..... but i will love her with all my heart, honestly...but i'm guessing it will never be. cause i've been searching for that special someone, and with the girls before, i never liked any of them. not one bit. but they like me, thats why i agreed, cause i didn't wanna make them feel rejected. i never want to be with a girl that i don't have feeling for, so i broke up with em, and this year i've been alone for a whole year, cause i thought i found the one, i waited for my time, the time came, but i never told her.

now, i think its over, but i'll never be over her. i promise myself that i wouldn't be with a girl that i don't have feelings for. and now i only want her.but she never talk to me again. and i'm just swallowing my pain, swallowing my pride....swallowing the love that i never had.

"i love you honestly, i want to love you honestly. but you didn't give me any chances. so now i'm left here, to wallow in grief. i wished they never told you, you were nice to me, now you're cold. i don't wanna know why. is it because you had the wrong idea of me? even if i do like you, i don't want to become your boyfriend, why would i? i'm not the perfect guy, for someone like you, it must be the perfect guy. i wished you read this blog. i only wish the best for you...only for the best. cause maybe thats what you always wanted. not me"

WHAT?

2009-11-24T02:45:00.001-08:00

i wonder what did i do? i never did anything. i didn't say anything.

maybe thats why, its because i never did anything. it seems she's a bit colder to me. i'm gonna leave her alone for a few days...

and once again, what did i do? whats wrong with this world and me.

"WHAT DID I DO? " -asking the world what did i do

i'm just another emo boy.its just aother day

2009-11-20T00:58:00.000-08:00

i know.its true, the more i deny it, the more true it is. emotional.... how stupid isn't it? i should have stuck to the rules when i set them.

guess the only thing i want to know is, the what ifs.... i wish i could read my life like a comic book, or just any normal book. always knowing the ending, but i never could, the only ending i could see is my death, and even thats not certain when.

but anyway, my legs still hurt after my accident yesterday. i went through with the test. and i guess, i did badly.. and afterwards went out. still enduring the pain. but i still went. guess somethings are just that easy to do, when youhave strong feeling for. thats it for the update.

"but i rather be working for a paycheck than waiting to win th lottery." Bright Eyes- The First Day Of My Life

Not really

2009-11-19T16:05:00.000-08:00

I'm no good when it comes to talking to the girls that i like... thats it.... who doesn't right?
but i'm a mass comm student, so why am i so shy in front of her, i only talked like a bit by bit...
must be those stupid butterflies that keep flying in my stomach. still i've got to keep my hopes up high. i'm hoping that i'll be ready in time when i tell her how much i like her.

i must gather enough courage, and strenght and hopes, and of course prayers in hopes that i can confess to her...declare my feelings for her. but for now, i'm just happy she's happy.....

"i'll do it someday... i'm not hoping to become anything, i just want you to know. what your decision is, i don't care. as long as i do have my love on you....." Realization of a hopeless romantic

no intention (unimportant stuff, don't read this.) its aprivatepost...

2009-11-18T08:21:00.000-08:00

i've no intention...she must've know... i have a gut feeling. i don't know what should i do... never had i had a crush for a girl like this one.

maybe i should just tell her... but if i do tell her, wouldn't it be kinda awkward? me, the guy who she just met a few times... but you'll never know if you don't try..... so i'm never gonna try.. better stay in ignorance then facing the music.

and due to some stupid circumstances... theres also all that rumour around campus... (how i wish to only stay hidden.) hidden... i like being hidden, if it gets out, i don't ...i don't know what to do.

i've faced humiliation by my friends more time, as far as anyone knows.. i'm not being emo. i even knew she read this blog.... but as far as it does bother me... the code that i used to hide her name, it was so obvious.

and thats when everything gets tougher... i've thought about it.. maybe she is outof my league.. maybe that pie in ths sky dream that i've had is just meant to be pie in the sky dream. that star i've been trying to reach is gone. that wishing star i've been wishing on is stupid. and all i have left could only be just what i do have left. i mean, i know, that with all the things happening around my life, i've always have more things to think about. and life isn't worth it thinking about just one girl, but all i want is for that one girl, no THE GIRL, to be a part of it. so i can always have someone there, in the bad times... or the good times... or just any time..... and just cause inever really liked a girl this much before makes me think that...well lets just say that it makes me think.

will she always be the one? the one that i'll always spend my time with, from the first until the last. but thats all just a thought of a hopeless romantic...thinking too far ahead. when everythings happening now.

but i rather not tell her. if it means there will always be that awkward moment whenever i see her.i'd rather keepit to myself, than feel that what i've done is just for nothing. cause confessing you love someone that much, is like taking a HUGE step in my life. its not like that i have feelings for anyone else. i don't. i don't have any feelings for any girls that i meet. there are special ones... guess she'll never know.... guess i won't know... guess that all i could only do is just stand in the middle of the world and just look around. that happy ending that ive always dreamed about won't ever come true. but i'm not searching for it.

THIS POST IS SERIOUSLY STARTING TO SOUND ALL EMO.. SO I"M JUST GONNA STOP...

this blog has always been a haven for me. to express my thougths to the world. but i've neverbeen able to express my thought in real life. so i'm just gonna stop, stop doing this, start getting a real life, and just start thinking like anormal person would. so long i've always thought my life was like a movie, or TV show that i've ignored eveything and just keep doing what i do. but its not, that dream girl that i like, won't be mine, that job that i've wanted to have all the time won't be mine, i'll probly end up with just a crappy job. and friends, they aren't always what they seem. they always have something up, behind or front, with or without me. and i'm always the kind of friend, that usually in movies , be the unimportant ones. (the best friend of the hero, that becomes an unimportant part of the plot asthe story progresses.)

risky risky business, i'm only a risk. even if i do confess to her, where would it end up. even when i'm only her friend, i'll always want more, so maybe i shouldn't be involved with her. maybe. maybe maybe.(i hate using mabye)MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE....

"don't know why i'd fall for you, i only wanted you to always smile, so if i'm not the one that could make you smile, then... i guess i'm not the one... " Confession of a hopeless romantic...

Been A while

2009-11-05T03:50:00.001-08:00

It has been a while since i visited this blog, since i'm very busy with studies and facebook, and trying to make this girl like me,ow did i tell you i found a new crush?... she's so perfect...i guess i could say she'sthe girl that i've been looking for. but who knows, love isn't something i can control...

i'm making sure that nothing will disrupt me again. the reason why i stopped blogging before was because of the new semester starting and now its finally reaching is end. and i will try to update it as much as i can... so for now i'd just have to say one thing..."ILOVEYOU9101"

"You're no different" Ozzy Osbournes

RAMADHAN...

2009-08-21T05:30:00.000-07:00

i'm seriously thrilled... because for once, i'm looking forward to the fasting month, mainly because i'm trying to lose weight...and seriously this time.

Ramdhan al-mubarak, the month in which muslims are required to fast (not eat) from dawn(Subuh) till dusk(maghrib).

to few people these are a nuisance to their daily life, but to most its not. and to me its like a blessing whereas i could not eat if i wanted to, without anyone else seducing me to eat. but no seriously...i'm trying here...trying to change, but noone seems to understand. well i'm not gonna whine and stuff because this is a blog, not a diary.and by change, i really do mean the real change, i'm gonna be a more better person alltogether. and hopefully i will finally end up with a girl that truly likes me, insyallah...

anyway, have a pleasant fasting month to all the muslim worldwide.

H1N1, Haze...the dreaded H

2009-08-10T06:25:00.000-07:00

One by one, it appears that our country is plague by things that most of us don't even want. first the H1N1, then the haze, so we as the public must try to fend ourselves from these problem , cause if you don't, then its a problem not just for you, but the whole community. so in any case, we should all prevent it from happening.

P.S, if you are inflicted with a really powerful fever, don't hide it, cause if it gets worst, you'll end up dead, or paralyzed or something. the worst things that could happen is you'll be quarantined. then after a week, if you're better you'll be let go.

heres a safety precaution;
1. wear mask anywhere you go that has a lot of people there
2. wash your hands clean (scrub all teh details, and the nail and stuff)
3.cover yourself when you sneeze(which you should do even when when there's no pandemic, cause its rude to sneeze in front of people)
4.TRY to avoid crowded place, and if you have to go, wear a mask, or face cover(i.e scarf)
5.if you're friends are sick, avoid contact(unless the sickness is physical, i.e broken hands, legs, or plastic surgery)
6. if you're sick avoid contact to the outside world physically( i.e socializing via the internet, talking through the phone, sms, email and if you desperately want to see a person, 3G them or videocall them.)
7. haze is a problem, if you have an elderly/baby or someone who has asthma, keep them indoor(do take note that the swine flu mostly infects those with low antibody count, i.e elderly/baby/ sick person)
8. if somehow you THINK you have H1N1 , wear a mask, isolate yourself from anybody, and go straight to the hospital.

here are the examples of what to expect here in Kuching:

This is in Semariang, near Sukma...notice the picture are dark? not because of my photography skills but the haze

and heres the view on the bridge on the way to Buntal....

And for the safety precautions that's good;(since i don't have any other model, i used myself)

Good and safe

oh, and since i'm a motorcycle rider, i have to use a scarf to cover my face(the normal mask would be torn if i use it)

these are just precautions, so please if theres anything wrong with them tell me, cause its dangerous if we don't know. i've also been hearing rumours that the vaccine for H1N1 is being cultured, to supply the whole world. in any case take safety measures before they give the vaccine, even if you have you're own precautions......

TAKE CARE.....

i love you, LEFT4 DEAD!!!!

2009-07-02T22:29:00.000-07:00

here's a tribute to my favourite game for this year, aside from spore and red alert 3...

this game, is like a combination of two games, that is a combination of Counter-Strike and Resident Evil, or the hybrid of both, Counter-Evil....hmm...

any way... here's the games info, the world, like many zombie games and movies, is under an outbreak of infection.and the best thing is there is no cure for zombie-ism, but there is a cure for necrophilia...i have no idea why i said that. anyway, the zombie virus spread across the world, and everyone that isn't immune to it dies, or anyone that's been bitten becomes a zombie once they are dead, like many zombie related games and movies. so it is up to the 4 survivors of the game A.K.A 'us the player' to escape from the nightmare of these unfamiliar zombie outbreak. and by the way, there are also 4 'hero' zombie types.. Tank, Hunter, Boomer, and Smoker...these 4 are the dangerous kind of zombies, not because they are a further mutation of the virus, but when you are left behind, and one of them manages to catch you, then you are dead...sorry to say...so instead of only relying on yourself, you must also rely on the AI or your friends too.. did mention you can multiplayer with your 3 friends too?.. the game requires a lot of teamwork, if theres no team work.. then you'll die the second the hunter/boomer/smoker/tank catches you....

so here's a few picture i had of the game....be sure to play the game!! you must play the game .... its a must to play the game... the game must be played!!!!

here's how you will view the game....

team work is always important

Watch the back of your teammate and they will watch yours coz if you don't...This is how you'll end up... being dragged by a smoker a cross a hall, while he bites and eats you..and so will the other zombies, if there are hordes of them...

or worst, you'll end up dead...goodbye...on the lighter side, you get to continue on playing if the other survivors found you trapped inside a closet somewhere, or a toilet...

and like i said if you are left behind chances are you could get attacked by this guy... the Tank, a big chunk of running muscle...ready to charge and hit you, and throw heavy stuff your way....notice the ground shaking everytime he's near....

and here's what happens when he manages to incapacitate you... what a downer....and if he hits you a few time while you're down, then you'll end up...

Here again... dead.. sorry to say...

And as an ending word, if you are playing this then you're probably enjoying it... if you haven't played it yet, then you should play it, cause if you don't you are missing out on a lot!!!! and if you played it but hated it, then you're probably a no good footdragging zombie... and i'm coming to get you!!!!hahahahaah

You are not alone

2009-06-27T22:40:00.000-07:00

Michael Jackson: 1958-2009

May He rest In Peace.....

A video tribute.....from You tube.....We shall meet when the time comes.....

A Singer may have died but a legend will live forever..... We Love You Michael....

Can't wait

2009-06-23T04:41:00.000-07:00

This is what i'll say this whole week.....

Got Good News and Bad News

Good News: A new Drum Kit is bought by T-Man
Bad News: UITM semester is starting next week

Good News: This saturday is the Come And Join Me Party

Bad News: Tickets not here yet...

Good News: Finals over and the semester just ended!!
Bad News: got no ideas for this break, not one shit....

Good News: Just got my full drivers licence
Bad News: I got No car

Good News: Tranformers 2 is out
Bad News: got no shit for cash.....lame

The Exams are finally here...Final will be over,and i will be free to play Left4Dead ..

2009-06-12T04:05:00.001-07:00

My finals are this week and next week. thankfully this week is the easier subject, giving me enough time to study for the exams next week which include, Introduction to Advertising, Introduction to Print, and Writing for Electronic Media. I'm really studying my heads off..... seriously....in fact i shoud be studying now, but i'm not... because i'm too lazy.... so enough said, i'll be back and blogging full time again after the next week is over....

i'm a mess,... and busy...

2009-05-23T03:48:00.000-07:00

nothings seems more important than what i'm about to do next week, on the 29th of May, in LIMKOKWING borneo, no its not my final, and no its not the day my assignments are due. its the musical that me and louis have been working on since the last 2 weeks.

yes a musical, and its going to be very interesting, very, very interesting. so in any case if anyone who reads my blog are from kuching or is visiting kuching on that date please c0me and see our performace for that day. and i promise you it will be really entertaining.

and i have like 5 more assignments to go, and Gawai is also just around the corner, and the final is after gawai. and hopefully with all the commotion this year, it won't end just like that, i mean i'm on a roll and the momentum is high. nothing could get in my way, unless its the thing that i hate most.

and more picture soon to come. and the reason i haven't updated my blog in such a long time is because i'm also devoted to another blog. the other blog that i am involved as a writer is called talkinghornbills. basically its like any other blog in the world, but it's written by me, and it covers almost all the events that is happening and also i get to write about things that i think are interesting, basically its like my blog only with the event covering thing happening.

heres the website's address (i didn't put it to links so you guys have to do it the old fashioned way copy and paste)

www.talkinghornbills.blogspot.com

"the dark is always around us, and there is no light other than one"
Me, 2009

It's dark, are you scared?

2009-04-26T05:42:00.000-07:00

Light, when people think of this, they would always think of happiness good, heaven, and all that sentimental stuff, while the opposite of the word, Dark, whne people think of this, its always about sadness or death or emo or evil. how would people react if i say that most people are afraid of the darkness.

here's a question:

It is in the middle of the night, you are alone at home. suddenly there is a huge thunderstorm and then the lights just gave out because of some busted fusebox.what would you do?

A. Grab a torchlight and replace the fusebox with a new one

B. Leave it and replace the thing the next day

most of you would probably have chosen the option A. well that just goes to show how afraid people are. but then again when i say this, people will say they are concerned of burglers or robbers or rapist or serial killer. well those kind of thought mostly emerge during a blackout or when you are facing a dark place, example a dark road. when there is a blackout happening at my house, i would usually think of ZOMBIES, which would be the coolest thing to happen. but then again it could also be my biggest fear, i mean suddenly waking up to a world filled with zombies...

anyway what i was talking about, darkness is a thing that everyone fear at some point or another.when you hear someone that is afraid of the dark, that's not a kid aged 12 and below, they would probably think that their crazy, like that dude form sleepy hollow. but face it, we are afraid of the dark, even me (i'm admiting it).

Darkness can play tricks with your mind, especially when its pitch black darkness, the kind when you couldn't even see a hint if light, you wave your hand in front of you eyes but you couldn't see it. then some strange sounds starts to come from around you. you think its nothing but the sound just keep coming closer, and closer. until it is just beside you. then it turns out that it was just your friend trying to give you a torchlight.and no this incident didn't have anything to do with me...

but there is a few good things about being in a dark place, especially when you're with friends and you know about the whole trick that the thing can do to your head. you can scare them hahahahahah....(i do not encourage people to scare old people and/or people who are suffering from heart attacks because it can cause a shock to them and kill them, believe me okay...)

this whole post is actually about something, finally!!

"then again its me myself and i"
Butterfinger-GirlFriday

holding things in my arm

2009-04-23T03:49:00.000-07:00

there is nothing more valuable than what you are holding in your arm. i never did get this term.

so instead here's another post about absolutely something.

something kept appearing in my dreams lately, and itsw been keeping me up all night. and that something is actually a nightmare. i keep having nightmares about freddy krueger, and the creepy thing is, he talked with me in my dreams asking me to kill the people he's killing. and so i did kill them, of course it was a matter of time before i started to kill the people that i eventually woke up. i did felt like i missed the chance to actually try and kill something in my dreams, but i woke up. the next night i dream of killing zombies. its actually kind of fun killing zombies but it was all in my dream, of course i did kill a lot of zombies while playing resident evil, but dreams are much more real, because you are as if in the dreams.

and much to my horror, after that i dreamt of going on a date with this girl that i used to have a crush on, and she actually likes me, but the thing was, she was some kind of vampire. and thoughout my dreams she tried to kill me and suck my p...blood! and the creepy thing is when i woke up i had all these scratch marks and my neck was sore as if something had twisted it. i never took notice of things that happen but eventually it lead to how i'm feeling for the day. and i felt like crap. i don't know why, i have no reason at all to feel like crap.

what the hell is this post about? i don't know.. so all i got left to say is look both ways before crossing the road, and never think twice when you're about to do something....

a shield to guard us all, a shield to shade us

2009-04-06T09:18:00.001-07:00

when someone promptly asked me what weapon i would choose if ever given a choice, i would most likely choose a large shield. some may say that its the most lamest weapon choice ever made. but to me its not. a shield is the most efficient of all weapon. because captain america uses it.

i used to ask myself why did captain america use a shield? why not use a heavily armed machinegun or an auto burst shotgun? my brain started to function as it would normally would when i want to piece up something broken or solving something.

why a shield? most people would say that a great offense is a sturdy defense. but then again, a great offense is mostly a great offense. but where would my brain go without thinking more about it. a shield symbolises a passive nature. the reason why captain america uses a shield is because he is symbol of passiveness. he is a soldier, and a soldier protects, eventhough he doesn't have any natural superpower, though he does have the super-soldier serum inside his body, which makes him like super in some way. but still his shield is his trademark.

a shield to a spartan warrior is like his right hand and another weapon beside spear and sword. the shield protects the fellow spartan, and protects themselves from enemy attacks.

i would mostly use a shield myself because another character that i know also uses a shield to fight, that is Goofy from Kingdom Hearts. yea, and from the description on the first kingdom hearts, when you choose the weapon at the start of the game. it says that a shield is used to protect your friends. and that is also why i would mostly use a shield more than any other weapon.

so the reason are as follows:
1. a shield is a symbol of passive-aggressive
2. a great offense is a great defense.
3. with a shield, you can protect your friends from danger
4. captain america uses a shield
4. Leonidas used a shield
5. Jason from Rise Of The Argonauts uses a shield as part of his weapon
6. Goofy uses it in Kingdom Hearts
7. i chose it when i first played kingdom hearts
8. if you throw a shield it always boomerangs back to you if its round and curved and thrown into right angle
9. if its made from vibranium it can absorb high pressured attacks
10. if your father before you and your grandfather before you used it, and its blessed by Apollo, then chances are, its enchanted and can shield you from damages even made by minotaurs or chimera.
11. if you're a disney character, and your shield is named Save The King, then it is you most powerful weapon, next to the keyblade that Sora won from defeating Sephiroth.

my conclusion is if you're in a battle choose a shield, but chances are in this day and age, they don't have any more shield, so find a good body armor.

i'm still here

2009-04-06T06:59:00.000-07:00

so recently i came across to some jokes. it goes like this:
what do you call someone who is cold and a jerk. the answer?
AN ICEHOLE...

i didn't get the joke but hopefully someone out there gets it.

and some good news, i have my own band. my band is called, The March-Mellows. its because we are very mellow. and march, its a cross between a marching band and the month of March.

and unfortunately one of my band members wasn't here this week, so we didn't go for any practice, instead i went out with my friend who just recently came back from matriks, Nazwan. yeah he's back, cracking up more jokes and something he does thats very funny that none of my other friend can never do, and with long hair he looks like shah rukh khan. no seriously, he even admitted it...hahaha

but on a lighter note, there was a PIKOM PC FAIR last saturday. so the four of us went there, me, T-man, Nazwan and tman's brother. anyway the place was crowded, but good news this time is that the fair was a lot bigger than last year and the attraction is a lot more, and the girls promoting the stuff are getting more eye catching. yes its true, not really but you get my point. i did found this cool new CPU that looks like the transformer robots, but brownish orange, and cost rm 5,xxx. i don't really know the price but it cost at least 5 thousand ringgit. and as always at a pc fair,the carpark was always a problem. we parked at parkson and had to take a long walk to permata carpark(yes the pc fair is at a carpark). how ironic is that the carpark did not have enough parking space. i don't get the irony but some do.

so i didn't buy anything when i first went, in fact i only went once there, but i did told my brother to buy a mouse for me. he was going there to buy a new High Definition monitor(yes we just bought one, but my laptop does have HD too) that my father wanted, and a new video card. with the newly bought video card, i could play rise of the argonauts, finally.......

without the video card, all i could see was chunks and blocks and slowly moving character killing something t red and yellow. now i could see jason(the argonauts) killing a chimera clearly. thanks to the video card, which is nvidia.

and today is monday. which discreetly means that its a bad day for everyone who has to work, have school and/or class, but to me its a wonderful day. because i'm having my midterm break this week. and just this week, i have no other plan. but this friday is good friday, not girl friday, meaning that most of my friend have a day off meaning i can do something, maybe call the band together and jam, or something. and the goodnews about nazwan coming home is that he can be our new camera man. thats right a new camera man. our band started off with a camera man who turned into our manager( Eee-In) then a camera woman (aishah) then another camera woman(T-Man's girlfriend) then another camera man (Opiey) and now maybe its Nazwan...

and since i'm on the subject of explaing about my band, i really want to explain how it all started:

before i was playing in my own band, i was a drummer who used to jam with my cousin (Gay).most fontunately the type of music that i play is different than his preference due to his nature of being such a poser, and he changes song like he changes clothes. so i started bringing T-man along as a spectator then becoming a camera man, then he started to sing radiohead's creep, so i wondered what if we made our own band, of course i always wanted to form a band with him ever since we were still in highschool, but back then it was a Hip-Hop band.

so anyway, i just let the thought play in my head for some time. as time went on, T-Man's cousin came along to kuching, they are from the Peninsular. anyway we started hanging out, and then we went jamming for 2 hours. and in that time, we brought along Gay, we played all sort of songs with me of course on drums and Gay on guitar. T-man was still watching and sang a few songs. but Gay was always there ruining the song. so afterwards we learned that T-Man's cousin have a band back home. and we were like super jealous, but not really. anyway after that we decided to form our own band. without including douchey Gay in our band.

while the process of thinking about forming our own band, i kept playing drum for Gay untill this one fateful day, the week when T-Man was having his midterm break. so we started off by wanting to go out for a day out doing something stupid in town, and we brought along Eee-In. so while thinking of wanting to do something, T-Man suggested that we go jamming, and i said okay, but who will play the guitar, and he told me to play because i can, and then the question was who plays the drum. i asked him to play the drum but he say he couldn't, then who would sing. so then out of nowhere he suggested that we bring along a friend from his college along who knows how to play the drums.

anyway we picked him up and went jamming. as it was fate, he turned out to be a great drummer, seriously. his name is LuLu, BTW he's a guy.anyway a day after, we wanted to go jamming again, and LuLu suggested wanting to bring out his uncle, who we first thought, bring an old guy jamming? so we went along, and we found out later he wasn;t old. he's a great bassist and he could also play other instruments well too... his name is Zack. and thats how we all met... and then of course we started jamming together, and jamming until we all agreed to form our own band. and that is history told from the eye of the guitarist of March-Mellows.

this is just some picture of us that i cropped together...

anyway, The March-Mellows will rise soon enough....

i'm feeling this

2009-03-23T06:34:00.000-07:00

anyone ever felt so mellow that its like everything is blurry and things just seem to go slow then fast and then slow again...well that never happened to me before.... this is just a short post... sorry no idea...

not now not after....

2009-03-20T07:40:00.000-07:00

this is something that i've done for several days.... because apparently i love to take photo, and because my dad just bought me a new DSLR Nikkon D60. the thing is cool to use and really good for one's creative mind...

here are some of the picture that i've taken:
This is taken at Heritage Cafe

this is also taken at Heritage Cafe..

Anyone ever been to Kampung Goebilt? This is where they sell fresh fish....
and this is....well apparently this is me, some took this picture while i was sleeping....who did that?

that is all, since i have no further idea on what to write this week.

"I can't think of younger days, when living my life was everything a man could want to do, i could never see tomorrow, but i was never told about the sorrow"
Bee Gees - How Can You Mend A Broken Heart

101st post.....

2009-03-13T19:16:00.001-07:00

ok simply to say, i posted an empty post with just a title called 101st post, it was stupid, since the first post i've ever posted was about the same, i only posted the title..

which brings me to a what i'm wanting to post, i've been saving money to buy a new guitar, its
a Santa Cruz.

wish i had a picture of it. and i like the guitar as much as i like my crush, but if it was a choice i would choose the guitar, or the girl whichever sounds nicer.
anyway i'm still google-ing the picture...if i found some picture i'd be sure to post it....

"Reading my blog is just a boring thing to do, anyway, this was just to kill time, and i still love my crush.....i feel like that song by that guy called david archuletta..."

Dear someone....

2009-03-11T23:13:00.000-07:00

for the past days, i've been listening to a compilation of the greatest hits from the FAB FOUR, or also known as the Beatles.. and because of some of the song, i've become JIWANG, EMO, Or Sentimental, and because i have suddenly aquired this feeling, i've become a victim to this cruel thing known as a crush.... it has been some time since i last have a crush on someone.... its a cruel feeling, that makes you feel like you just want her to know how you feel, and then maybe expect she would feel the same as you do... but it never is as one would think it would end.

i love her so, but she would never love me, a cruel thing, i would like to think, she knows i like her, but she just let me go....

this is how Emo i feel right now...
i've developed Feelings... something i thought would not happen to me considering my heartless condition.

i thought she would notice how i look at her, the way one would not look at any other person, the way someone that wants to see what her hearts says, the way that would want to fall in love with her , the way our eyes met, and how i fell for her.....

it really does feel shitty to know that you have a crush. a crush is what a schoolboy aged 7 would feel when he saw a girl he liked. it happened to me several times, but as i reached highschool, it all just became meaningless. so i dropped the whole cute boy act and became somewhat of a badass....not fully at first, but as a reached another period of time in highschool, when i was 15, freaky things happened, i lost my sense of morality, my sense of justice, my sense to do anything right, so i went with it, because it made me feel great. but somehow things happen for a reason, no girl would ever love someone who doesn't have a heart. i feel so heartless, and now i've grown a heart, and i have a crush on someone... i just hope she feels the same way or not, whichever it is, i hope this crush will move on quickly...

it hurts me so, that you don't understand how i feel, it hurts me just to know that i'm not him, it hurts me just to know, you are just my crush, and my love will somehow live on....

TQ,

i love you my crush if you are reading this.....

still remember the night...

2009-03-09T23:31:00.000-07:00

tuesday, another day to feel so, tires/bored/fun/happy/sad/whatever!...it isn't like my days have gotten good so far. i'm still hoping that things would turn out good and by hoping things turn out good, i feel it wont turn out good... i dont know why i'm talking about something turning good. my heart still feels empty, and need someone to fill it out, preferably a girl, because i'm not gay...

made this boring picture last year... when felt bored one boring day, and that boreness made my boring day more boring than any usual boring day that my boring life would boring have, and because boring is like part of my boring life and that boring boring boring boring...... you get what i mean right?

too bad its not real....

2009-03-07T21:49:00.000-08:00

i have no idea on what to write...but to be honest, non of my post has something pre-written beforehand.... but in any case i will write about something that kinda took my interest, but i'm not sure what that is.... so I'll write about nothing, again....and the thing is i haven't posted a blog in like more than 2 days mainly because my laptop is, not broken, but on the same line,the charger overheated and kinda died out. and so i'm force to use the PC downstairs, which i hate because i can't watch southpark, or family guy or undergrades or something..... so now i'm like bored and i have to wrap up the post quickly because my brother is giving me like only ten minutes to use the PC...

so yesterday i went to Sematan with the SOCIAL SCIENTIST, which means mass comm students....and it was kinda fun. had some swim, played truth and something, watched a turtle on the beach(not literally) , then baywatch?, and treehuggers... it was awesome... and i hope that i can do it again.....and because of yesterday's trips, i am tired as hell or heaven or some place...

"Aku berdoa, kau ada bersama, Kan Ku kira bintang, harapkan kau pulang"
-Gadis Mimpiku-

thinking back, and i'm really not looking for anger,

2009-03-01T05:52:00.000-08:00

to have a new semester is like having a new school year start. anyway, last week was the first week of my third semester in LIMKOKWING Borneo, and in a mention to some of my friend, i'm now in my second year here...meaning one more year to go, and one PLKN to go through this year... which means my life is starting to get fun this year.

2009 started lame and sick and boring and kinda crappy. no one remembering my birthday, no presents, floods, stuck in a floods, had to be in a flood, and tried to swim in said flood, but with no avail, the water is murky filled with shards of broken glasses, and a copious amount of animals that lives in water and or comes out during floods a.e: snakes, scorpions, rats, pirhanas, crocodile, and of course water lizard.

slowly going on with 2009, it turned out better, my friends learned to play guitar, met a new drummer, met his uncle who is also our bassist, and then the most miracolous thing happened, i actually started a band. hmm, quite interesting. and so.. i also met a few girls in the process, like so and so.and in the event of starting the band, i also managed to write and compose two songs. ...pretty much its starting to get better.third semester starts, and i made an oath to myself to not be like last semester, that is my normal routine last time go to class, go home, sleep.. next day, same thing only buy KFC. and next day same thing also, but with chicken rice,and the next day as such.... so in not trying to repeat the boring stuff that i did, i try to get involved with more of the college activities, and hanging out with friends after class, rather than stay at home, and try to organize and or volunteer, with some kind of public event or campaign, like my first semester i voluntered with the ONE LIFE thing at the spring. apparently nobody seems to notice but, i did went there...some people did saw me and i was like all covering up my face... i started babling about useless shit again, and so i'm stopping...

okay next thing this year, the course decided to start a magazine, college-zine.. so i was suppose to design the magazine cover, and i was like why me? and nobody answered...i accepted wholeheartedly, and i also wanted to write some article for the magazine... and so i was stuck with thinking, what am i suppose to write about? music?(not so into pop music) lifestyle?(as if i have a life) food?(steroetypical fat guy typing here, so no) sport?(write about what, hot girls in sports) or just random things....maybe write about the culture of blogging, or facebook... maybe i could start a social observation? .....screw everything, i just write about freaking life or something....its much better than nothing...

"It's her hair and her eyes today That just simply take me away And the feeling that I'm falling further in love makes me shiver but in a good way..(you get it right?)"

Stephen Speaks-Out Of My League

when the Matahari terbenam, all the nightlife starts...

2009-02-24T05:39:00.001-08:00

started class yesterday, and the need to drink and chainsmokes starts again. not really, but it really does help with the building up stress. started long ago, and stops when i'm in the hospital. anyway, i'm still waiting for tomorrow, when the band comes together, and we have a new vocalist tomorrow, a girl. one of azzra's dream in a band is for a girl to be in his band, and now my band has one. and if you're reading this azzra(i doubt he even reads the words thats in the search bar or even the stop signs) in you face!

stop everything alert the press, i just finished learning one the song that have been hard for me to play with, an Arctic Monkeys songs the song is called "When The Sun Goes Down" also known in their new album "SCUMMY" yeah what a scummy man, just give him half a chance i bet he'll rob you if you can....

yeah some part of the song, and hence the title of this post. can't wait for tomorrow, and signing out..

"Come and Talk to me on my computer screen, the best years of our lives aren't as easy as they seem, to get the girl, and make the grade, its all a show, its all a game, and i would lose it if i play, but anyway...." Good Charlotte- The Click

look what i've got...

2009-02-23T00:40:00.000-08:00

its almost here...something is almost here, every year, last year it was mine, this year is somebody elses'

yes it is almost here, the SPM/STPM result is almsot in. the reason why i've brought this up is because of the airtime it's gonna get on TV, every station has the same thing on, but from different kid and different schools. but there's always gonna be one student thats gonna get the highest record, like breaking 21 A's or 30 or 200 A's, and such.. but there's is always one thing that i always expect them to do, like telling the viewers that the reason they got that kind of record is because they want to prove something, and its not because they want to be on TV. but lets face it, who doesn't want to be on TV? not me(lying) mostly everybody...but that just doesn't pulls my strings at all.. i'm okay with SPMers and STPMers getting high score, but the only thing i want to see on TV is the answer to this Question that is asked to student that gets many A's or medium number of A's

Q1: How do you do it? what's your secret in getting this many A's?

A1: well i don't want to brag but, i did absolutely nothing. i never went to any of my class at school, i didn't study at all at home, i go clubbing during the weekend, okay i go during the weekdays too. and drinking and smoking keeps me awake the whole time during the exams..

Q2: Who do you thanked for your success?

A2: i wanted to thanked my teachers and my parents, but sadly that meant i would have to lie. seriously though, i only have myself to thank, my teachers said i would fail miserably, and my parents are either busy with work or fighting about their divorce. that about sums it up for my thanks. oh and yeah, i would mostly like to thank my friends that helped me forget all the trouble at home and school by bringing me out and such. and of course my girlfriend.

Q3: Any words to this years SPM/STPM facers?

A3: well i would mostly say study hard and smart, but it didn't work for me so all i need to say is study whenever, wherever you want. or you could do with a last minute preperation thing, like moments before the exam, you do your revisions, so you'll remember everything, seriously.

that would be something to watch, wouldn't it? maybe i could make a movie about it, you know like slumdog millionaire..

quotes, quotes and quotes...some of my favourites

2009-02-16T06:29:00.000-08:00

quotes.. these are my favourite words, the best thing about them is that its very philosophical, and you're always right, because its not thought of by you.. most of my quotes come from songs, like Fall out boy, or the strokes, or elefante, or bloc party, or eric clapton, or dudes like bob marley..anyway, i haven't used quotes from movies or famous classical heroes, or old minds(like aristotle and socrates)so here are my collections of quotes that i really, really really like...well most of them are on love, and most of them are from wikiquote, and from this book of quotations that i bought a few years back...

"And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit. For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught."

"Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself. Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love. "

Khalil Gibran, The Prophet

"The Encyclopedia Galactica, in its chapter on Love states that it is far too complicated to define. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of love: Avoid, if you are able to."

Douglas Adams in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

"All our young lifes we search for someone to love. Someone who makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope. All the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, there's someone perfect who might be searching for us."

Kevin Arnold (Daniel Stern) narrating in The Wonder Years (1988)

"Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies."

Aristotle

"The stage is more beholding to love, than the life of man. For as to the stage, love is ever matter of comedies, and now and then of tragedies; but in life it doth much mischief; sometimes like a siren, sometimes like a fury"

Francis bacon

"True love is your soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another."

John Beckwith ( Owen Wilson) in Wedding Crashers

"You are at the begining of your life, perhaps you will have many loves, but if you are fortunate, you will have only one love."

Jolee Bindo, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

"All I have is my love of love and love is not loving. "

David bowie

"Our love is like the wind you can't see it but you can feel it! "

Landon Carter, A Walk to Remember

"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. There are three things that last faith, hope and love, and love is the greatest of these."

Landon Carter in A Walk to Remember

"Love is watching someone die."

Death Cab For Cutie

"Love is most nearly itself when here and now cease to matter. "

T.S Eliot

"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come. "

Matt Groening, Creator of the Simpsons

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will finally know peace."

Jimi Hendrix

"There is scarcely anything else in the world but that: to love one another. "

Victor Hugo in Les Misérables

"You are what you love, not what loves you"

Donald Kaufman (Nicholas Cage) in Adaptation

"Everyone can be great because anyone can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't even have to make your subject and verb agree to serve...You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love"

Martin Luther King, Jr

"We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it. "

"Everything is clearer when you're in love."

"Love is a promise, love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear"

John Lennon

"That which is done out of love always takes place beyond good and evil."

Friedrich Nietzsche

""How grateful I was then to be part of the mystery, to love and to be loved. Let's just hope that is enough."

"Love's an excuse to get hurt. And to hurt."

Conor Oberst

"In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, no matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror. "

John Steinbeck in East of Eden

"True love is the only heart disease that is best left to run on. "

Mark Twain

'Stop talking about love. Every asshole in the world says he loves somebody. It means nothing.'
'But it's true-'
'Still doesn't mean anything. What you feel only matters to you. It is what you do to the people you love; that's what matters. That's the only thing that counts.'

Stephen (Tom Wilkinson), in The Last Kiss (2006)

"Man is in love and loves what vanishes,
What more is there to say? "

William Butler YEats

Hope you enjoy reading thism, or suffering through it, whichever ones suits...
Leave a comment or something cynical and/or sarcastic...please i need sarcasm in my life... lately my sarcastic feelings have gone...

nothing in this world...

2009-02-14T06:58:00.000-08:00

i just discovered darkness in my soul... and i'm liking it... just beware, i'm much more evil than i was before...

nice guys finish last....

2009-02-14T06:21:00.000-08:00

THIS A WORK OF FICTION. ANYHTING WRITTEN BELOW DOESN'T HAVE ANY RELATION TO THOSE AHO ARE ALIVE, DEAD, DYING, OR ABOUT TO BE BORN. ANY SIMILARITIES ARE PURE COINCIDENCE, OR IT MIGHT BE TRUE. YOU HAVE TO THINK HARD IF IT HAD HAPPENED TO YOU BEFORE, JUST THINKING IF IT IS DE-JAVU. BUT THEN AGAIN IF YOU DON'T REMEMBER THEM, OR IT NEVER HAPPENED, THEN, NO WOORIES RIGHT MATE? ANYWAY HERE'S THE STORY..

DIARY OF SID:

i hate being a nice guy... especially when you're around girls. cause some girls never go for the nice guys, they always go for those jackazz types...some of this are true in some situation, unfortunately for me its true. since i have to be a gentleman whenever i bring a girl out, i thought that was what a girl would want.. a nice dude who open the car doors for them, and pays for their meal, and walk with them all the way even if she's a slow walker, and stop conversations with friends that you meet while you were walking just for their sake.

unfortunately, she doesn't pay attention to any of these. when you open the doors for them, they slam the door shut in front of your face, and when you pay for their meals, they buy the most expensive things, and when you try to walk the same pace as her, she says she needs some space, and when you stop talking to your friends that you meet, she talks for hours on the phone, leaving you to wait at a table at the foodcourt while you eat ice-cream, and the other one you bought for her melts away. she doesn't pay attention to any of these...

then a week later you found out she broke up with you because she wants to start seeing somebody else. that just breaks your heart, but you're a nice guy, so you let her go, thinking if its love she'll see it, and love you back. but then you start seeing her with someone else while you were out with your friends, and then another guy the next day, and another guy at night. you have to start to think, are they friends or are they clients?

so a few days later, you start a new resolution,(not swearing off girls, and start liking guys, and start being gay) start being an asshole, and be a punk, a rebel. chicks dig that. start swearing at everything, stop with that faggy voice and start talking like a a dipshit. fix the stupid hair-do, dont make your hair look like those pencil pushing dorks working at some office with medium paid jobs. use some clay and make your hair look cool, messy but cool...

FINISH.

thats it for my post, i have no idea why i'm writing like this, but it kinda feels like something that has been bothering me. not that its about me or anything. but anyway,read? do people even read my blog?

just a few more days

2009-02-11T07:17:00.001-08:00

there is just a few days left.. so all thats left to do is just, accept it..

finished what i started, start something else to finish...

save enough to buy things, buy things till its enough

eat till i drop, drop thing that i eat,

and nothing will change... unless i get a serious girl, to change my life... hmm(sigh) where is that perfect girl that i have been looking for...wheres 'just the girl i'm looking for' where's my sunshine after the rain'

hope i'll find her soon.... as i people would say a tomorrow is a new day.. but to me, the next hour is for new things.... and i'm almost finished with Warriors Orochi...

RoXane Aka Rozana

2009-02-01T20:13:00.000-08:00

This is the third video of our jam ....

its a slow to fast version... leave comment...as if..

Jamming vids...

2009-01-27T20:20:00.000-08:00

hey ho lets go....this is the jaming vids that i've been talking about. i'm the guitarist, and sometimes i'm the bassist...

Here they are.....

yes this song is called i wanna hold your hand....by the beatles

and this song is known as Hatiku luka lagi....by Blackdog Bone... or before it was in malay... Lets just kiss and said goodbye...or something like that...

there was a lot more vids but uploading them to youtube really takes a long time... so i just uploaded 2.....

"Oh PLease say to me, you let me be your man, and please say to me,you'll let me hold your hand"

walk in the sun..

2009-01-24T07:38:00.000-08:00

this morning, i woke up early. i heard strange sound of coming from outside of my room, and it came from my fish pond downstairs. it turns out that the water pump is leaking water out of the pond. the fish were swimming in toilet water(meaning there is so little water that they can barely swim) .. anyway after finishing up and fixing the damn thing, i took a walk around the neighbourhood. it was kinda peaceful there and all, without any car and stuff... so i got inspired(not constipated)

Morning walks,
peaceful talks,
war all around us,
cause by such a ruckus,
yet our lives have not change,
at this day and age,
we still work,
play and walk,
school bell rings,
no one in class,
its a saturday,
not a monday,
fortunate for us,
living in this bus,
of safety and regulations,
while the other side face wars,

killed or be killed,
shoot or die with a bullet,
live by the gun,
die under the sun,
the black nights,
are filled with sparks,

all we could do is watch,
as this reign of terror goes on,
in front of our tv screen,
then change the channel,
to watch some music videos...

to live and live by,,,

2009-01-23T08:51:00.000-08:00

hearing something new isn't always good. and for some reason, i dont think its good. i never commented on the Israel-Palestine wars... but i'm not... so many have written about it so i;ll skip it..

anyway, today is saturday, early morning...really early.

i never use LOL(laugh out loud) or as i might see it, Life of Lie....i guess

i really don't have anything to write so i'm just gonna babble about something...

do you notice that in every Petronas holiday greeting's commercial, someone would always die, except for that one year..

and does anyone notice that in every hour there is a minute in which we do not think about anything...

i really have nothing to write about, so i'll leave a picture

really it is. i'll leave a blank.

finding the cure to growing older

2009-01-20T07:43:00.000-08:00

ow man, this really sucks... i'm really not into these sick things, but i have to. its like one of those things that you don't like doing, and you're forced to do it....

its nothing to most people but, to me its very important, its why i have been avoiding it all this time... that thing is, shaving my sideburns....what you thought it was something weird? it wasn't

anyway, about finding the cure to growing older, i'm older, and a bit wiser, and a bit more cunning than before, so that makes me a bit like i was three years ago.

any way, theres this new thing going on with me, i'm starting my own band, and its gonna be like one of those weird cool bands(??what the??) what i mean is like, Weezer(?? hardly close) bowling for soup(??doesn't resemble) and my band is probably gonna suck ass... really sucks...... and my troubles are really beginning, because designing you're own jamming room is harder than i ever thought, especially involving the labour part and spending money....(full of crap)

but anyway, its gonna turn out great if i ever finish it....sadly i dont think its gonna happen...

"Is this more than you bargained for yet,Oh don't mind me I'm watching you two from the closet, Wishing tobe the friction in your jeans, isn't it messed up, how i'm just dying to be here? I'mjust a notch in your bedpost but your just a line in a song"
Fall Out Boy-Sugar we're Going Down

Sepi, the event untold and event upholded

2009-01-16T04:03:00.000-08:00

after i saw the film for the first time( yeah i just watch the film this year) ... i was speechless, the film was beatifully done. the camera angle, the script, the actors, the theme... it was just, wow. i really couldn't believe it when i saw the film... its a masterpiece beautifully written, and beautifully put together. if anyone thinks otherwise, then dont watch it.

to that extend that i finally say that the film is a must watch.... to all those who haven't watched it yet, watch it....

Mawar Liar

2009-01-16T02:16:00.000-08:00

... i met her at this shopping mall.. really bad girl, but she's sweet. she's like a wild rose, pretty yet very thorny... umm, not exactly a good example..okay... She's like a rose, pretty but not easy to be plucked, because of the thorns...yes... dont think less of my metaphores... i made them according to what i think is suitable...

for some apparent reason

2009-01-13T08:29:00.000-08:00

theres no particular reason. just posting this because i drank too much coffee, i'm caffein crazy now, too much caffein...remember dont drink too much caffein.

gud night ..

why ow why?

2009-01-11T07:12:00.000-08:00

is there nothing worse than a flood? yes there is.. all the while when i'm not celebrating my birthday (which i am not doing, because i don't celebrate any birthday) there is war going on in Palestine. and for some reason when there is someone who is not thankful it will always go to that war.... like per say, "i dont want this toy" "damnit play with that toy, people in palestine cant even play with that kind of toy." that is what usually happen when people aren't greatful. but the war or starvation in some other place shouldn't be like a thing to persuade you to be thankful. you must always be thankful, not because you aren't in some war or you're not starving in the dessert, but you have something to be thankful about..

so i decided to say to my cousin who's house is flooded right now and he has no place to sleep in, and almost all of his books and furniture in his house is ruined,that the war is much more worse than what he is going through... so what flood is much better compared to war, people dying, but flood only makes you wet....

and if you see people in the local malaysian TV they would only blame the government....always the government's fault.. luckily the people in Kuching, or Sarawak in general don't complain that much...dont think that just because i'm from sarawak..

and there are certain new things this year that kinda don't make sense to some people. one of the things that people really misunderstand is the wearing of seatbelt in the back seat. what people dont understand is that wearing seatbelt in the back seat is for safety reason. okay i know its nuisance, since it never is a law in Malaysia. my father said that he's been driving for 45 years, and he never use the seatbelt in the back and he's still alive. but surely he's old... so it doesn't count. people nowwadays are devil driver, or speed demon. which literally means they drive fast. but my dad still said that if you dont drive fast its optional... but seriously, even when you dont drive fast, if somehow some guy hit your car from the front or the back, you'll probably die.... and if you really don't believe me, think i'm joking around... you should watch this youtube video on seatbelts safety... even when one of your passenger dont wear a safety belt, you have more chances of dying than when all are wearing them... here are the videos:

Disclaimer: these are not my video, its from youtube, and if the owner do not want me to show these on my blogs anymore please notify me by placing a comment and i will gladly take it off from my blogs... thank you..

but just in case these videos don't show up here's the URL:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6Qhmdk4VNs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SEy_FCJlpk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwM6ib0zeNg

i'm a hypocrite i admit it, i ask people to wear seatbelt, when i don't do it... but its my choice, i feel that i want to live dangerously...but no seriously i do wear them, that was just a joke... i really wear it... if you dont believe me, ask anyone that knows me... i'm a smart driver, not an asshole driver...

" I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry I'm blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you, and i know i can't take it back, i love how you kiss, i love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round, and i just wanted to say I'm Sorry"
Sorry-BuckCherry

18 finally?

2009-01-09T15:35:00.000-08:00

i turned 18 officially 12 o'clock last night. it was really lame. everybody elses 18th burthday would be at some huge party, but all i did was eat a zinger, and watch I, Robot. ... my life is sad, and it kinda sucks now. so anybody wanna get me more down do it now..... my life is just a waste of space and time.. nobody even knows that i'm alive. i am being so emo right now.. please don't let me live through another day.

anyways... goodbye....ow and happy birthday to myself!! dude this is so lame!!!!!!!!

lovelovelove, kisskisskiss

2009-01-09T01:59:00.000-08:00

lips are bleeding now.... but its her first time... so its okay....

the day my life sucked...

2009-01-08T06:00:00.001-08:00

nobody even remembered my birthday.... this sucks... so i guess i'll just hang out somewhere this saturday by myself or with pyzul and basri... or whoever but this year is gonna suck really hard... this is so ridicolously lame, and so crappy

reminds me of candy...

2009-01-06T01:51:00.000-08:00

hey dudes and dudets, i did not know why i just used those words, but in any case i would like to point out that today is the 6th of january. which means its 4 more days until my birthday. unfortunately nobody seems to remember my birthday, which i think is bollocks(i do not know the meaning of this words, if anyone does tell me) or as i might call it in my native tounge "sialan celaka". and yes i do use these words to describe something crappy about me, or something crazy happening, or to some random dude that pissed me off while i'm driving.

yes, each and every year nobody ever remember my birthday, not my family, not my friends, and not those random friends on the internet. i really hate my birthday. maybe its because nobody remembers them, and that gets me so pissed off. maybe after i turned 18 this year, i might get pissed more often because nobody remembers that i'm 18. i always get the bad stuff and somehow i always get scolded for no apparent reason.

and as for something thats on my mind is that, i never had a girlfriend to spent my new year with, and because of that even during my birthday i dont have a girlfriend.. i mean come on, how sad is that? it really does sound sad, and it really does sound like i should go to an island or the island that the show LOST is filmed. or maybe i should stick with the possible like spend more days in my room playing video games, isolate myself from the outside world by never watching the news, never coming out of the room, and turning off my handphone, and to make it even worse i should only used flourescent lighting to make sure my eyes is really sensitive to the sunrays.

lastly, i want to play SNOOKER!!! i really miss that game. i was hoping to play it this weekend but nobody is coming back this week so its kind of a boar not bore, boar as in PIG... i'm starting to hate the beginning of this year, and if i hate the beginning i'll really hate the whole year. and i was wondering when is my life gonna be as good as it was in highschool, i miss hoghschool, the rules, the teachers, the friends, but not the uniform, i hated wearing uniform, but somehow i always look good wearing them....kidding...

i just done some video montage for highschool pictures of my class, and recalling back everything i saw, i really missed them... i really do..my friends, my old desk, my books, my drawing, my stupid ppencil, our class pranks, hating other kids, dissing other kids, and 'menyelak' (making fun) of some dude either from class or some other class but its usually me.....but i missed them...

"there is nothing new to me, i've seen them all, but you are out of this world, thats why i fell for you, and till my death bed, i always remember you..."

a new year, the end of something, and starting of something...

2008-12-30T20:52:00.000-08:00

THIS IS A FORWARD WARNING: ANYTHING FEATURED HERE WILL NOT HAVE ANY PICTURE, AND PARENTAL ADVISORY IS ADVISED FOR CHILDREN WITH INTELLIGENCE AT THE SAME LEVEL AS MY COUSIN AZZRA. ANYTHING THAT IS CONSIDERED A COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT WILL BE ENTERTAINED AND CAN BE DIRECTED TO MY COMMENT. BUT I LIED IT WILL NOT BE ENTERTAINED, BECAUSE IT WILL BE TREATED AS THOUGHT IT IS AN UNIMPORTANT THING, LIKE A SINGLE STRAIND OF YARN IN MY SHIRT OR A WATER DRIPPING SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EMPTY FOREST.THANK YOU

okay, tonight is the big countdown. and tomorrow is a new year. which i totally think sucks.. and by sucks i mean really sucks. cause every new year, i have to follow my parent and go to some stupid barbeque, and all. and the bad thing is, i have no friend at the barbeque. E-In is in KL, probably having a blast celebrating new year there, and Opie is probably at the PLKN camp celebrating there, or maybe he's here... whatever...

i have no mood celebrating new year, cause as i've always thought of it as meaningless. and probably because i have a fever caused by my stupid idiotic sore throat. and to make things worse, nobodies home. and i'm alone to face this horrible predicament like luke skywalker fighting darth vader in Episode 5... or 6...its 5

and making matter's worse is that, i have lost my voice, due to the sore throat. so in the worse case scenario, i probably have to stay at home, and be sick while the others are celebrating new year, hey i mean a barbeque is better than feeling all fucked up sick at home...at least its better than last year, and to make matters worse, another year alone... she's not here, and if you're reading this baby, always know i'll always think of you..hehehehe

i want to go somewhere else next year, maybe go to KL or Miri to celebrate Nu Metal Year... plus my birthday is coming this january and to be precise its the 10th...... following up to that i would also like to point out that this year my january 10th birthday will coincide with my birthday in the Islamic calender, that is 13 Muharram... which also is like last year, coincide with Awal Muharram. and somehow its a sign from god that i must be more pious and not miss my solat and stuff, but i cant do that especially when i'm turing 18. but i must. and by the way my birthday will be celebrated with a zikir and kia mulaail at my house. its better that than what Azzra did.

"then there were just the 2 of us, why couldn't have we been more, why couldn't have we love each other, and till the end we regretted our lost, and neglected to see that our lives were fading...." KMKORG- Till the end...(i'm forming this band... and this song i did write)

the day i kissed your lips and you are gone...

2008-12-26T20:08:00.000-08:00

and it was gone... and nearly just before the end of the year, in any case... happy new year!~~~ whatever....

and as an early new year treat, i've jumble up some bee gees with some of my own words, the song is "THE FIRST OF MAY"

when i was small,
and school desk were tall,
we used to love while others used to study,
don't ask me why,
but time has passed us by,
someone else moved in from that stupid place
....

guess thats it.... i just wanted to say that... heheehhehe, new year gives me brain damage... and it all comes back to haunt me every day... and my mind will go into a catatonic state, or as i like to call it my BIAWAK LAND SPECIAL....

a modern day randomness

2008-12-26T08:26:00.000-08:00

THIS IS A FORWARD WARNING: ANYTHING FEATURED HERE WILL NOT HAVE ANY PICTURE, AND PARENTAL ADVISORY IS ADVISED FOR CHILDREN WITH INTELLIGENCE AT THE SAME LEVEL AS MY COUSIN AZZRA. ANYTHING THAT IS CONSIDERED A COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT WILL BE ENTERTAINED AND CAN BE DIRECTED TO MY COMMENT. BUT I LIED IT WILL NOT BE ENTERTAINED, BECAUSE IT WILL BE TREATED AS THOUGHT IT IS AN UNIMPORTANT THING, LIKE A SINGLE STRAIND OF YARN IN MY SHIRT OR A WATER DRIPPING SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EMPTY FOREST.THANK YOU

this is just another one of my blogs that i dont think is important. it is an update. pictures can be fun, but i dont like using to much picture because it ruined my language department, plus i dont like my blogs to be filled with random pictures like ERNA's(yes you) blog. no seriously, too many pictures can create different meaning and i have a lot of pictures with a lot of memories, but i never used any of them to describe the words in my blog. and i'm sorry in advance if this blogs irritate you ERNA, but its just what i do, i'm annoying.

i dont get it with people, especially my friends, everytime i talk, they laugh at me, Azzra said its because eveything i said is funny, but i dont think so, he thinks its funny because something is definitely wrong with him, but how about the other people? anyway i wont think about that, that much because i have more things to worry about. like what to do with my life now? or what to eat for breakfast tomorrow? or do i have to go jogging the next morning? the answer to all of that is stupid, i know, but it doesn't help that those are the question that keep appearing inside my mind, and for some apparent reason, i'm just typing what keeps popping insde my mind. i hate it when that happens. and the rambling just continue on and on and on and on..

and to anyone who manages to read my writing as far as here, seriously its a lost cause. and thats all i;ve got to say...

"Oh Bidadari, berulaskan syair oleh awan, sang rembulan, tidak putus menyeret dawai biola, memujuk bidadari, agar tidak membilang lawan, agar menghentikan getar-getar, yg berkelana di ratusan jiwa"
Hujan-Di kala Bulan Bermain Biola

whatever you eat becomes something...

2008-12-20T06:13:00.000-08:00

i like to eat, and thats a fact...
here's where i go to eat
and i got pictures too

Kaya And Toast, for breakfast, a choice of Nasi Lemak Special or Curry Mee
but that day i ate there i ordered Nasi Lemak Special

yummy...

and for lunch i ate at Manhattan Fish Market, i know, people only eat there for Dinner, but its me...i ordered the Grilled Platter for One

usually i order the Flaming Platter for one but my mom ordered that so i didn't..

and by the way since i'm using more picutres now, i'll reduce what i'll have to say, because pictures paints a thousand words, so whats another hundred from me is gonna do, i'll let the pictures make the words... have your imaginations...

"Lookin' back as lovers go walkin past, all of my life, Wonderin' how they met and what makes it last, If i found the place, would I recognize the face? Something's tellin' me it might be you"

It Might Be you- Steven Bishop

Dear Sayang

2008-12-18T08:10:00.000-08:00

Dear Sayang,

Dear Sayang,
I know your far away right now,
In Some far away place,
In a far away town,
I'm sorry if i didn't see you off,
its because i didn't get a chance to,
but don't worry,
i'll be here when you're back,
waiting on your love,
will you love me back?,
hey, i know theres a lot of guy over there too,
they're just friends,
but me i'm more,
remember me always,
don't ever forget,
our promise that night,
or we both regret,
i miss you here,
do you miss me too?
i can only hope that you'll always remember me,
text me always,
i'll reply back instantly,
give me a miss call,
i'll call you back,
one miss called will turned me insane,
two could kill me,
i wouldn't know what could happen on three,
but i'll only say this,
missing you sayang,
always will,
i'll wait until you're back,
even if its forever,
i love you sayang,
always and ever...

the visit.. and the unfortunate... and the irony

2008-12-15T02:39:00.000-08:00

last week, T-man's cousin from Terengganu came to kuching, so the plan was hanging out with them, which was a blast, and i learned something new while with them, especially about the night life, and something else...(secret) anyway... this is the picture of us hanging out at Great Eastern... and it was a blast, and i
started to go back home in the morning again...

2 kelisa park next to each other with the volume maximum can cause a lot of noise

then theres that gay dude with us too...

so that was it... got a new friend learn something and did something... then went home early, the next day...and about the picture, somebody complained to me that i dont have any picture in my blog... so there you go... this is what you get...

and since i'm doing all the picture stuff, i'm gonna give something ironic, an ironic situation..

i met this truck on the way back from Miri, this truck carries the supply of gas to gas station, but ironicly, it ran out of gas

there you go happy?

"When I wake up, I'm willing to take my chances on the hope I forget that you hate, Him more than you notice.I wrote this for you. (For you so...) You need him. I could be him... I could be an accident but I'm still trying. That's more than I can say for him. "

Fall Out Boy-Grand Theft Autumn

today is another day... and something else

2008-12-12T02:42:00.000-08:00

i found out that i'm gonna hav to go to the PLKN.....good thing or bad thing? i dont know.... but anyway..i'll just go throught it.. its a call of duty, plus i'm interested in holding the colt M16.. so goodbye...

talk to me now i'm older..

2008-11-30T05:59:00.000-08:00

well i'm over my break.. and coincidentally that cousin of mine just also borke up... coincidence? or maybe he's just gay... whatever.... anyway its over, and i think i have fallen for someone, i don't know if its a crush or if its love, but its something old that i feel, its like when i first met DD.. well things didn't hit off between me and her, maybe because i was a shy unconfidence bastards back then but now i have the confidence but i'm still alittle bit shy. so anyway, this crush is very blocky, and i dont even know why i used that word, but i'm sure that its just one of those things that i randomly think about.

i found out that after my final that more is coming next sem, but i wont have to worry about that, since i go with the flow, and my final assignments that i have to hand in was the poster, sized A2, and titled 'Support your Local Music'....and handed the bloody thing yesterday.

so this was my day this week, and i that girl that i have a crush on, well lets just say that my life ain't worth killing time for some dames. but if she knows who she is, then would you please for the love of god, tell me that i'm only dreaming, i dont have a chance with you so i can get on with my miserable life....

"i found the cure to growing older.. and you're the only place that feels like home... "
I Slept With Someone From Fall Out Boy And All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me-Fall Out Boy

Finally its here, is it the final fantasy, is it the final countdown,

2008-11-25T19:57:00.000-08:00

this week will be the final for my study... wish me luck..and i feel sick as fuck.....and again... wish me luck...

its there....the superheroes, the comic, and the live action Film

2008-11-24T06:39:00.000-08:00

to many that is a great fan of comic-book superhero Captain america, most may know that he's already dead, in the mainstream comic book. he was shot by a sniper, then a few more times by handgun. why was he sent to court? read the story arc for yourself and you'll know. the arc is called "Fallen Son: The Death of Captain America" (Wikipedia)

Fortunately Winter Soldier AKA Bucky AKA Captain America's Sidekick will continue the Cap's Legacy, still using The Captain's suit and trademark shield, with a little addition of a combat knife, a gun, and some grenades..

and more good news for us all, in 2011he live action film of Captain America titled "The First Avengers: Captain America" is coming. then also in the same year, a film that really took my breath away, the one that i've been waiting for since the first day that i found the Acengers comic book, the live action film for "The Avengers". of course there an animated version of the avengers too that have been played in TV for quite some time now titled The Ultimate Avengers, which ironically is probably what the film is based on.

yeah it does, because many of the marvel film is basically based on ultimates marvel universe. like the incredible hulk , ironman, and of course Nick Fury is called General Fury, and played by Samuel L. Jackson and basically, the ultimates Nick Fury is also based on Samuel L. Jackson.

anyway, according to the online post i've been reading, the roster for the First Avengers Movie is of course, "CAPTAIN AMERICA (Steve Rogers), IronMan (Tony Stark), WarMachine (James Rhodes, and Thor (SOn Of Odin, Prince of Asgards), and judging by the way "The Incredible Hulk" film ended, (it ended with Tony Stark approaching General Thunderbolts about the Avenger's Initiative) Hulk is gonna be in there too. but from the various comics that i have read, he wont be so co-operative...

tragically, the original Avengers is not in it, specifically Ant-Man AKA GiantMan AKA YellowJAcket (Hank Pym) and THe Wasp (Janet Pym, HAnk's Wife)... and speaking of Ant-Man, his life action film is unnder development, the director for The Avenger's Film should include Ant-Man into the film since it fits right in, and its probably the right spot for Hank Pym anyway. WarMachines should just be in Iron Man 2. but its their decision, so whatever they make, lets just hope its good.

and maybe the plot for the Avengers movie will be like the animated Avengers, that is, starting with the Alien Invasion(Skrull's Chitituari) of earth. then Captain America is found frozen in ice, at the north pole, then the bringing him back to life, but that is likely to be Captain America's plot. ergh, whatever, it seems that my brain is struggling to make sure it doesn't explode waiting for the movie to come out...

so for now, good bye and "Exelsior"(Stan Lee's Line)

"Time,I've been passing time watching trains go by,All of my life,Lying on the sand, watching seabirds fly,Wishing there would be,Someone waiting home for me,Something's telling me it might be you....."
(It Might Be You-Kai)

steady as she goes, and i'm still wobbly....

2008-11-19T08:39:00.000-08:00

is it really love when you have a girlfriend when you're below the age of 18, or to be more exact when you're still schooling? from what i've seen in kids these days, and i've seen a lot, they are kinda crazy about finding girldfriends and boyfriends. and their libidos are just taking over wuickly, and at younger age. i've met this kid at the age of 8, thats in Primary 2, that tells me that he has a girlfriend, and at first i thought he meant that he has a crush on some girl, but it turns out that he does, and the girl actually is his girlfriend. and that was just in primary school. then i find my cousin, in secondary school.

earlier last year, i heard he has this girlfriend, who is older than he is, about four years older. then when i told him, that having a girlfriend at his age wont last about two month, he told me that it was going to b forever. so it turns out i was wrong, it only lasted for about three weeks. then it turns out he has another girlfriend, who he tells me that 'will' last , again, until forever. then one month later, again breaking up. this is the pattern that he goes through. i dont think he gets the point of dating, but i also think that because i've been calling him gay, it may turn out that he is gay.yeah maybe thats it, maybe its because he's gay. and also there's this girl that he says is gonna be his girlfriend, i mean he even tried to write a song for her, the song is kinda stupid, but in the end it didn't worked out. i wanted to make a move on her, but i'm not that kind of guy, who moves in too fast. i barely know her.

anyway, now my cousin is with this young girl, in form 1. i think it will only last about three maybe four month. but i don't care about him. plus i still think he's gay, he's just still in denial. plus the girl is probably still too young to know how to love. so the question that usually comes to mind is how old until we are ready to love? but i can't tell you that, but probably one of my seniors can, he actually posted this blog about what i'm talking about. i can't compare mine to his, because most of my blogs are just random things with experience that i have from things, or things that i know. but his is more factual, and more detailed.

and i'm having a really rough week. these last few weeks haven't been really nice to me, i mean, assignments, exams next week, and most recently, i'm heart broken. i wont tell anyone who broke my heart, but it does hurt right now. that night really sucked and i dont intend on being with anyone for about at least two weeks. i can manage to get back on my feet, barely but i'll live.

"never did i try to be yours, and never did you try to be mine, but we did meet, and our hearts were intertwined, but sadly it all comes to an end, on the month before the last, november is never gonna be a blast, then again it never was....."

last night she said goodbye...

2008-11-17T07:14:00.000-08:00

well lets not do this again... but good bye...

People are people because they are miserables bastard

2008-11-12T05:37:00.000-08:00

no matter how we look at our lives, we are never truly happy. even if you are happy about something like getting that bonus on your pay, or that girl you like actually likes you too, or even you winning a free car, theres always this part of yourselves that feels miserable. as i have come to notice, we never really get what we want, maybe its for the best, maybe its just not your fate to get it. why is it that we are destined to be miserable? its because if we are happy then we dont strive to do anything. we just sit on our ass and just enjoy it. but its much more enjoyable when we work for what we want, happiness comes from what we earn. but then again if we get what we wanted wont that just be easier?

nothings comes easy in this life, even when you are rich you wont feel totally happy, there the income tax to worry about, then about people asking you for money, or taking care of your money after you gone, will it be enough to finance your entire family, there is a never ending chains of question. some questions are stupid, but then some are concerned-wise, and some are just questions. these questions are the factor at making us miserables, they cloud our minds into thinking that we are never gonna achieve that super happy state. its kind of this sub concious mind thing that happen to us everyday. like me, these questions appear to me every time i open my eyes. but the questions in my life are different than the question that is in somebody else's mind. just trying to answer these question can bring you into total depression, maybe these are the things that causes some people to have psychological problem, maybe its not, but whatever it is, these questions that appear in our heads are hard to miss.

our lifes are about answering these question, different questions appear for different people with different lifestyles, but there are major questions that we all have in common. some of them are: will we ever be happy? when will we die? who is our true love? are we ever gonna be rich? no matter what you do you have to always work hard at what you are trying to achieve, and never ever give up even when theres doubt in your mind. because no matter what you do, theres always another day, after today.

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift, that is why its called a present"

thinking of the old days

2008-11-03T06:05:00.000-08:00

anyway...to really get back in the days of my school life, i should post my very first written thing inside the book that have been mentioned before...i named the creepy thing "my thoughts exactly"

29th March 2006, Wednesday

My Thoughts Exactly
'The Weeds Do Work'

What to do if Ten people start fighting? how should i know, besides its just an opening quotes. well what the heck, i'll just start writing as my journey starts today, a journey that long ago i started but just today i started chronicling it. This is my story, story of my life, sum of my life, and 'The Journey'

What if i were to tell you that people have a short life? if they knew they were gonna die tomorrow what would they do? Probably they will do everything in one day. But apparently thing aren't always what they seem, or do they?....Hm...i'll have to think about that.
THinking all and all, everything has gone ballistic and people are dying everyday, caused by war and total pollution as it is part of our lives.

Maybe pollution isn't bad, i mean they do contribute to some of the most dangerous diseases like asthma, bronchitis, lung cancer, normal cancer, TB, and some other not worth mentioning. thinking back in my mind, perhaps just as long as we live, our lives trend to be are always surrounded by poison, threatening our lives each minutes second, and nano-seconds(physics, just learned)

THese are my thoughts for today, the day of wednes, the first day of my chronicles, the first day of my life.
END

and i just realize why i started writing this thing. it happened after the death of my friend that same year. after going to his funeral, i realized that my life could end at any time, and what then? what would i do when i die? do i have any legacy? have i left my footstep in this world, so that was why i was so active that year... explains a lot... but after that, death was like a normal thing to me....thats the end of my post... thank you..

"what i gotta do to make you want me?what i gotta do to be heard?what do i say when its all over?and sorry seems to be the hardest word"
Elton John featuring Blue- Sorry seems to be the hardest Word

the past, using my deloreon, or to be exact my EX5 class, i've travelled back....

2008-11-03T05:12:00.000-08:00

since its almost the end of the year, i do my yearly ravaging through my old stuff.... and in the spirit of ending the year i also like to dedicate my deepest condolences to my Uncle and Cousin in MIRI for the lost of my Auntie Sarimah...(Al-fatihah if your a Muslim)

anyway, in wednesday went with the entire family on my mother's side to MIRI in the middle of the night, and we arrive just in time before the burial...

anyway, about ravaging through my old stuff... i've found something earlier in my life that could be sorta of a blog to me, only it was in papers, and i write on it using pen, with some broken grammar, and weird syllables. and guess what, i've also found that people actually read my rambling in that book, and to be very honest it was kindla like my diary back then.. and after reading through the thing again, i've found that it wasn't actually anything close to what i'm doing now. it was more influenced by my obsesion of indie music back then and something involving death and the environment.... dont wrry, if i have the chance i'll scan the bloody thing..

and the sad thing is about that, my diary was read by people... and it succesfully became like my own handwritten blog. people actually enjoy my death rambles, and mocking people... the year of the diary was in 2006, when i was in form 4. i started writing that after implying that my social skills were very ugly, and stopped writing after i have some friends, and then quickly everyone became my friend, and by the end of the year i didn't finish what i started i just left the book, because probably i was busy with the school magazine, and Police Cadet, and other stuff, sports and such and not forgetting the big Marching thing at Padang MErdeka, which was the nationwide celebration in Kuching. and i was lucky to be chosen, because it comes and goes about ten years or so for sarawak to be chosen to celebrate the Independence Day nationwide. and i was in it...heheheheh.. i dont have the picture but i do have some pictures of us training there....

The Yellow Liners

ME and Pyzul

on the way ke padang merdeka... still with pyzul...

early morning preparation, still dizzy because did not have

enough sleep.. Getting enough sleep, tired after training....

those were some really awesome time, i mean meeting new friends, and such.... plus meeting pretty girls, but not really pretty....ewh...

To be continued...

Heroes is the best, and here's my thing that i do

2008-10-31T08:18:00.000-07:00

THE PETRELLIs

The petrelli's family power are mainly taking power from someone else. three of the family members have displayed this ability, such are Arthur, Peter, and Gabriel/Sylar. Arthur takes power by taking them whole, not leaving a trace, but fortunate they are alive. peter's power are empathy mimicry, meaning that he can have the power just by being exposed to them. and the last guy is Gabriel/Sylar. he can mimic the powers too, but his way is different, he must first find out how the powers works, only then he can do it.the form is intuitive aptitude. these proves that LIKE FATHER LIKE SON.isnt it cool?

but theres another guy missing, Nathan. but according to the season 3 episode, nathan was born without any power, so his parent gave him powers, unfortunately, the powers are not so great than what his parent expected but its also cool. he can fly.

and next theres Angela. she is a precog, but she doesn't paint, think of it as imagination precog. too bad in the recent episode she is in a Coma.

and then theres the granddaughter, named Claire. she doesn't take power because the line blood is long, so she didn't inherit the power. but theres another reason, Nathan doesn't have original powers, it was synthetic power, he was injected with, however, Claire's mother is also an evolve human, the born with the power kind. and i do mean her real mother meredith the pyrokinetic one. pyrokinetic have the uncanny ability to not get hurt when they start fire with any part of their body. so this power is almost like regenerative healing, only they cant get burn easily. the traits there.

and since i'm in the mood to talk about power. i too have the imagination to have powers too. and if anyone actually has the actual formula that is talked about in the show, please inject me with it. i would like to have powers seriously. nah i'm kidding. but it sure would be awesome.

" Why are you scared to dream of god, when it's salvation that you want? You see stars that clear have been dead for years,But the idea just lives on...."

We are Nowhere And its Now-BrightEyes

i'm afraid to be your friend because i'll always want more

2008-10-24T04:32:00.000-07:00

i came back from the great life,
it is by chance,
from the attention of a lot of girl,
to just wanting it from you,
but my ways were wrong,
i mistreated you,
just like all your past boyfriends,
but all you wanted was the old me,
because of my ego,
i forgot what you wanted,
never inteding to hurt you,
and not asking for forgiveness,
because it wasnt all my fault,
you had your share,

you showed me your love,
but i choked,
regretting that choice,
awkward filled me,
not wanting to lose you,
and losing your friendship,
our friendship was the bond,
that made me fall in love with you,
and in the end,
we ended up looking at each other,
and asking ourselves questions,
where would we go?
what path is to be taken?
will we ever be more than just friends?

Inspired by:
JUST FRIENDS,
starring Ryan Reynolds and Amy Smart.

Jungle Of Hope

2008-10-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

This is one of my all time favourite novel. it became so after countless hours of reading it, iover and over again, befoire going to sleep, and waiting for my dad to pick me up from school. then again, it wasn't my favourite all the time, before this it was Dr. JEkyll and Mr. Hyde. it became so after i actually really understood what the meaning of the story was, and the relevance of the story to our lives, and to be exact, the live of the student thats bound to read it. when people read novels, they read because they want entertainment, and its not easy to find one who really interpret the meaning of the real agenda behind the story. mostly the student that reads them only read them because their teacher told them to do so, and if they dont read the actual thing, the teachers knows this.. and at times, i too know when my friends haven't read the actual novel.

at first i was really confused at the story, and how it begins, but later i found out the significance of the story to my life. many would laugh at the fact that i would actually emulate something from what i've read, when in actual life, i'm not that kind of person, and to be honest, i'm not that of religious person too. anyway, the truth about the story was that, it was written in 1983 by the guy that called himself Kris Mas. it was a story about how families struggle to survive just a few years before the start of the second world war. their hometown being bought by the English for Tin mining, and moving andd starting a new land in the middle of the jungle. and at long last, the families, got through with it and live happily.

there are two characters that i want to focus on, that is Zaidi and Pak Kia . these 2 characters represent each one of us in one way or another.

Zaidi:
Zaidi is this modern thinking guy who doesn't solely depends on rice fields like his brother Pak Kia, and he makes a living by running a shop, and employing aborigines to supply him with rotan and such. but he is not greedy, and he is religious. he follows the Kaum Muda teaching, and tried hard to fit in wiht time unlike his brother. Zaidi is the kind of guy who can adapt to changes quickly. what i'm about to write may change your life, or it may not, but whatever it does just, read on through. The opening of the tin mines, and rubber plantation means the ending of the old days, meaning its the end of the rice planting, and on with the making rubber and industries. that is what is written in the book, its the conveyed message. but from my point of view, the ending of the old days represents the end of our school life. it means we need to move on sooner or later, but whatever our decision is we still have to move on. zaidi accepted the change quickly but realized that not everyone can be like him. sound familiar? well after finishing secondary school, some of us can adapt to life in college or university much quicker than anyone else. you are adapting just fine without realizing that not everyone around you are fine. some are slow to accept the change but some can't accept the change and are left behind. in the novel those who i meant is left behind is the other townfolks who left the town and starts another rice fields in some other town. and in real life, those who are left behind mean that some may drop out due to the harsh nature of college life. so in short Zaidi represent change, or ourselves moving forward into new things adventuring into the unknown.

Pak Kia:
Pak Kia is the old guy that at first solely depends on rice fields for a living. meaning if the rice fields get blown away by a hurricane, he and his family would die of starvation. he was at first adamant on staying where he is, not intending to sell his rice fields and move somewhere else. but as the story progress, he decided that it was time to move, so he agreed with zaidi to sell the land, and he and his family started a new life in Janda Baik. he struggled to open the new land, and in the end he succeeded. the intepretation here, its not always easy adapting to changes in the world around you especially when you have lived way too long in the old world. you start to feel uneasy about moving on, not wanting to change the way you have your life now. this relates to the life of a secondary school graduate by meaning that some of the student dont want to move on with their life. they rather live in the "old world" meaning school, they dont want to leave school because they grew up living in the school, and learning and maturing with its environment. the reason is there things that may scare you when you move to college or university, like the way you study, at school you are spoonfed with every detail of info into your brain and forced to memorized the thing over and over again. while in college or university, its different, you have to study hard, take notes for yourself, do more research, study group and more. this sometimes scares the 'Pak Kia', because this is a new environment to them. they are the kinds that take things slowly, and changes slowly, not wanting to lose memory of what they have had in the old world while they travel to the new world which was quite unknown to them. Pak Kia represent the old way of life, the part of ourselves that wants everything to stay the same and at the same time wants to move forward but slowly, discovering the new world.

this was my intepretation of what the Novel Jungle Of Hope. although the writer has been deceased for years, i still respected him for what he wrote. and i think this is what the education at school wanted us to know by reading the novel, at least that is what i hope it is.

but seriously, the conclusion from what i had read before was that, changes is always okay, although sometimes it may be challenging at times but you have to change, you have to move forward and carry on with your life.

"Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why,
We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye
And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?
Let them ring out loud till they unfold"

Melodies of Life-Emiko Shiratori (Soundtrack Final Fantasy 9, Garnet's song)

Real Life is much better, so is Fantasy

2008-10-20T06:01:00.000-07:00

real life is lame, but its real, and we are the occupants. probably many people wished that they can live in the world of fantasy. i mean, i can't deny that i sometimes imagine that i'm in the world of HEROES, where i would have the powers of cryogenic, meaning i can create ice, which is kinda awesome. but seriously there is nothing wrong with imagining that you're in some fantasy world but when its time to wake up from those fantasy, you have to wake up. really wake up. some dont intend to wake up from those fantasy, and sadly most of them turned up crazy, or killing themselves.

but seriously, why i did this topic came to my head? well lets just say that it happened, and its not good to talk about it. when you're in love, never expect what you would expect in movies or tvs, or fairytales. i'm seriously pissed off at girls that thinks story books love is real, and they try to make it happen and sometimes when the guy doesnt get it its his fault, for not wanting to be "in love" with her. but seriously, you cant expect a guy to be there with you all the time, and receiving your call 24-7. i mean how can i answer the call when the guys in the toilet, and then tells the guy that he doesn't love her, and when you have a class or work or something else to do, your always cheating in her eyes....

fantasy are just things that goes about in peoples mind. dont expect it to come in real life, and if you're married, dont ever think that its all gonna be good, and like i said, is never gonna be happily ever after. if you always expect that you're always gonna live happily ever after, you're never gonna be happy with the girl or guy you're with, or worse off, you'll get a divorce.

i love you but i cant touch you

2008-10-17T04:18:00.000-07:00

her smile, her voice,

is echoing in my head,

no matter what she does,

i'm still in love with her,

she's my first kiss,

and probably gonna be my last,

the way she treats me,

so nice and warm,

i saved her more than once,

just like superman did with Lois,

or spiderman with Mary-J,

She's the epitome of my love,

we sleep beside each other,

but we can't touch,

if i touch her,

i will probably lose her,

never want that,

never to lose her again,

I love Her but i Can't touch her.......

Inspired by: Pushing Daisies

Silent your phone you freaking idiot!!

2008-10-09T18:14:00.000-07:00

handphones.. they are the most incredible thing that has ever been invented. they have helped me in a lot of way, mostly breaking up with a girl without having to face them, or asking them out, without being too socially awkward, and sudden choking. so it has helped me alot. and to whoever invented it is a real genius.

however, there are times that i really get pissed off at the freaking thing. these are the situations.

1. using handhone at the movies.

who wants to be disturbed when you're watching a great movie like Lord Of the Ring. it wasnt just during that time, but during any movie that i have seen. like theWineKone has said in his youtube video, there is always some freaking idiot who doesn't silent their phone when they are in side the cinema. seriously, they have this note showed before the start of any movie that specifically asked you to silent your phone! dumbass! silent you damn phone, you stupid jackass!

2. using the handphone freaking everywhere anywhere

i know you have a lot of credit in your phone, dont do this thing where you go everywhere and just carry the phone in your freaking hand because like every 2 or 3 minutes you'll get a text from someone you know. its freaking annoying. i have this cousin, who i call gay(AZZRA) and everywhere he go, he would usually get a text from someone. and when he goes out, you know what he spend most on? credits. i mean he spent about rm1000 per week just for the sake of credits. and he's not the only one, i also has this friend named Tony who's in Labuan's KML, and according to my other friend, he buys phone credits rm 30 every freaking day. thats a whole lot of money. i dont know whos he calling or texting, but i hate this behaviour. and there was also this girl that i used to date, she w agreed to go out with me, but when we were at this cafe eating, she was looking at her freaking phone the whole time, like i couldn't even finish a damn sentence before the next text would arrive. so i never saw her again, and when she actually did text me some other time, i ignored her number. and please for the love of god, dont text while you are walking , its a stupid idea, because when i went to the Spring last Saturday, there was this douchebag, who bumped into me while he was texting someone, and laughing like an idiot while reading the damn thing. he was angry at me for bumping into him. and i said what? and told him not to be a jackass and text while you're walking. isnt it obvious? i hate jackasses like that....

3. using your handphone while you're out with your friends or talking, or studying, or doing anything that requires attention.

dont ever if you are hanging out with me in particular use your damn phone too much. why use your phone to talk to someone when your friends are already there to talk to you, dumbass. sseriously, use your phone for emergency calls, dont ever text in front of me unless you want your phone to be usable for the next few days.. and when you are in class, or tuition class, please have the courtesy of not texting. it really bad enough that youre not paying attention, you're actually wasting youre time there. i have this friend who went to the same tuition class as me, but every week we meet, he would always buy a reload card before entering the class, and by the end of class, he would buy another one. and the class was merely 2 hours. and he bought like the rm50 credit. and i was so amazed by the way that he spent his money. unfortunately, everytime we went for a break, he would asked me to buy the Jantayu Burger for him, using my money..... what a douche.

seriously people, stop doing things like that that could really annoy people. and i know the reason why some people like to use the phone when they are hanging out with their friends, it may be because they hate their friends or they have no social skill at all. even i talk or socialize when i'm out with my friends, me, the guy that hates everything about my life, and spent most of my days locked up in my room. for me hanging out is the only thing that lets me socialize, that and going to class. and all the guys that i have mentioned before, have tons of friends, and all they do is text and call, and text and call more. such idiots are useless. and try not to comment me saying that i dont text to people because i dont have any friend, i have lots of friends, and i only text them when its important. why would i text them just so i could talk about games, or dating, or girls? maybe because i like to talk instead of texting, or i dont like wasting credits, i dont have any credits technicallly, since i'm a post-paid subscriber. so my words to all the idiots that have done this, or to people who have friends that does this, give a big slap to yourselves or your friends because chances arre you can still save them from becaoming a mindless texting zombies.

"I'm a lot like you so please Hello, I'm here, I'm waiting I think I'd be good for you and you'd be good for me I asked you to go to the Green Day concert You said you never heard of them How cool is that?? So I went to your room and read your diary: "watching Grunge leg-drop New-Jack trough presstable..." and then my heart stopped "listening to Cio-Cio San fall in love all over again.""

Weezer El-Scorcho

when theres nothing to do, dont do anything..

2008-10-09T01:50:00.000-07:00

HEROES.....HEROES...and more HEROES....

just finished watching HEROES... the 4th episode of the 3rd season....oh god... it was so intense, i might have woken up my neighbours baby, by screaming for no apparent reason, but i think it has something to do with the fact that PETER almost killed NATHAN, and SYLAR suddenly turned good........ thats all i can say to not spoil it for anyone that watches heroes......haahahhah

also, i just watched episode 6 of "90210", the new generation of the old Beverly HIlls 90210... really there are pretty girls everywhere in the show, like Jessica Stroup, or Shenae Grimes, or AnnaLynne McCord .... but wait theres more, even the actor that potray their moms are pretty hot..... really....they are hot... seriously..

and another show that returned for a 2nd season is, Chuck. and by the way its not a show about throwing stuff, its actually a show about action and SPYING .its like an American James Bond, only, the lead character isn't as good or strikingly charming like James Bond, but the girls are always hot....

Pushing Daisies.. its not a kids show that takes place on a daisy field and kids running around the field and then getting stung by bees. its almost like HEROES, but think of it being a cross-over of HEROES and Lemony Snickets: A series of Unfortunate Event. with the show being narrated. and the HEROES part, the main character thats called NED has this amazing ability to revive the dead, but only for a minute, and if they are let alive for more than that, they will take the life of another one thats very near to them, and if NED touches them the second time they will die... again. so far the onlly death caused by his power is his mother's life for his girlfriends CHUCK's father, then his mother again because he touched her the second time, and then theres CHUCK"S life for a guy who steals at the morgue... and thats it...and by the way, the relationship between those two are not very advisable, since they cannot touch one another.

theres more shows that i want to write about, but i dont want to... and did i tell you that i went to the CATS FM studio today... it was what i always thought it would be, bubbly radio presenter and a whole lot of microphones...

"What's the deal With my brain? Why am I so obviously insane? In a perfect situation I let love down the drain There's the pitch Slow and straight All I have to do is swing and I'm a hero But I'm a zero ..." WEEZER-Perfect Situation

a little out of the odd-dinary

2008-10-05T04:49:00.000-07:00

as i have predicted before raya, or specifically the month before Syawal, or October, or during ramadhan or last september, this year's raya wasn't that fun.

the reason?

probably because the time to celebrate raya seems quite shorter and shorter, and maybe its because raya is getting more, and more closer to the month of June. it is the middle of the year and you're celebrating raya... its just kinda not so right. i mean its fine if you're a working class citizens, but if you're a student, any type either school, colleges or even university... it is never fun maybe its because in the middle of the year, you dont get that much of vacations from school, or any institutions. and by not so correct calculations, the date when raya is going to be celebrated at the end of the year is, quite posibly in the year 2018, or somewhere close to there... and by that time, i'll either be dead, or i might have a family, or i might still be living with my parent's house with or without them, or i might be in a hospital somewhere getting open-heart surgery... but in any way i won't be a student in that year....

so anyway, here are the things that i've done durin raya... and if i haven't been to any of my friends house i'm very typically sorry, its either the time was tight, or i was at your house and you weren't home... seriously...

i didn't have that much time at home, the only time i was home was probably at night or the first day of raya(my family had an open house)most of the time was actually spent visiting others..

like the second day, i went to my mom's family.. which included her uncles and aunts and grand-uncles and aunts and to me, they are all my "NENEK"... i just call them that.. and this year the visit ended kinda early because my mom couldn't go no more because of her high blood pressure, and she was sleepy, it was only 7.10 pm..... i dont know whats up with that... and on the plus side i did get to see one my favourite uncle, or to be more specific my dad's cousin.. my father calls him Ghani, i might have to call him Uncle Ghani.. or maybe it was Pak Ghani...well the reason he's one of my favourite is because when he talks about Islam, i somtimes can relate to what he is saying, like how there is a secret war between the different schools in Islam about how to perform your daily prayers, when in the Quran it is stated you must perform the Solat(daily prayers) and the Hadith shows you how to perform it(as Rasullullah wanted us to perform as he did during the prayers) . and to not be terorize by some menacing comments after some have read this, i will not go on...but you catch my drift.....

and finally on the third day of Raya, my time to o visitin with my friends(T-man, Nazwan, Zakey, Pdos, Ridwan, and Kobad(Pdos's friend)and rahman) it was planned to be a about 9 pm, but instead it was pushed forward to11.00 pm. ow and the time shift was caused by waking up late, and long showers.. so we finally did get started, the first house was ridwan's(for me and nazwan) and the second house was Zakey's(first for the others) the third house was Zila's, and then since it was already noon and it was fridays, we had to go perform the Friday's prayer.. we chose to go to masjid Jamek, which was bad idea if you're in a hurry.. the traffic was really-really really really really bad... my car got covered by some ass who drives a Perodua VIVA. but other than that it was fine afterwards.. we went to romy's house to send Zakey over.. and we ate some really yummy things there. and after we went to my cousin's house, OPIE..we had to go there, my mother pressured me to go, and we did. which was agood thing, since we haven;t had lunch. they prepared a delicious meal of steam chicken rice, and daging masak hitam. all of us ate there. so we did...then after... we went over to someone's house i couldnt remember the name... but it was sure fun. then we went over to our BRO's house, brother Fairuz, our substitute teacher who we can really relate to and now maybe he;s like a friend.. and over at his house we found some of his sister's friend over too at the same time as us.. and we had to hold off the fliritng for a while since its raya.. so we behave.. and one thing that brother fairuz advised us all was, never commit to a relationship, have as many friends as you can, and when your ready then you settle down.. this is however is quite similar to my code or also known as the Bro code(which i learned from 'how i met you're mother') which is never marry until youre 30..and the details are quite the same...so afterwards we went to the spring to go kill time, and browse for books, and ice cream.... and later we went searching for Ezza's house which we couldn't find and then to dedek's house... and lastly i went home...quite tiring but i didn't come home late, it was only about 9 something...a nd when i came home, Nek Abu came just after me.so i had to wake up my mother and such ... my brother came home late maybe 11 and my other borther even later than me maybe about 1.00 am... and next morning i woke up and still got the scolding for going home late... i dont know why but it so happens that its my fate....

so the journey ended there... not really the fourth day, yesterday, went to more of my mom's relatives' house and more house... finally came home where nobody was.. both my brother;s wasn;t home... so i was forced to do labour again... when people show up... and when i asked to borrow the car to go to my friends open house my mom told me i cannot go... she said i had enouh fun yesterday... what am i an SPM student?.. so i never went out since yesterday, and still trapped here...i can't wait till i turn 18 next year, maybe then she'll treat me like an adult...

tomorrow is when class will start again, it will be a hard morning to wake up to, but i have to, because i have to... then again most of my assignments are done and i really cant wait to go to Cats FM this thursday, or wednesday...really i cant.....

"you are the epitome of my every being, the essence of my everything, the love of my life..."
heard it or read it from somewhere...

of the dead, and the dead, and zombies all around....

2008-09-26T00:40:00.001-07:00

today, just a few days before raya.. i will post my favourite zombie movies, based on what i have seen througout this short life of mine.. and if any of you don't agree with me, please direct you comment to the brick wall over mnyah>>

SPOILER Warning! due to the jackass nature of me, i'm giving in the ending too....

Zombie thriller , favouritessss...

1. Resident Evil Apocalypse:

the second movie, a sequel to Resident Evil. it starts of with a game known as Resident evil or Biohazard in japan. notice why i didn't choose the first movie as my number one, well its because i didn't like the first movie, the zombies were all in one place, that is the underground facility. unlike its predecessor, the zombies are set loose inside Racoon City. there are a whole lot more zombies, and because its a big place, you never know where the zombies might come from. like this scene when Alice, Jill, Peyton and the reporter lady ran from the church and straight to the graveyard, the zombies actually rose from the grave. when i first saw it i was like... "whoa! how come ?"... .. okay anyway, its the whole nemesis thing that really sparked my interest in the movie. in the game, nemesis, like its name is your enemy, most probably one of the most hardest boss i have ever faced in the series, but in the movie, he's actually the good guy from the first movie mutated into nemesis. and he actually helped alice to escape, but sadly he died, like Carlos Olivero in the third movie, and Kaplan in the first movie. and we also get to see the sexy Jill Valentine live and in action, almost as good as Alice but not good enough. unfortunately, she didn't return for the third movie, but two of the guy from this movie made it to the third movie, L.J and Olivero... the end of the movie ends with the destruction of Racoon City, and Alice being resurrected back to life after she was impaled with the metal from the helicopter....

2. Land of the Dead:

second most awesome zombie movie i have seen.. most probably because its like dawn of the dead, where they actually kill the zombie, instead of just being eaten, although at some point in the movie the zombie actually got into the city and ate a bunch of people, who cares?.. they're not the main character. and the best part is, they have this vehicle-like-bus where they can actually fire missile, and RPG, and machine gun, and it has this camera for parameter search and , and...and...and.. you can be safe from zombies in there, unless you open the door, or the sky light. its the only zombie movies that i've seen that actually has a hero zombie, or the zombie that actually has intelligent, and can use tools. it appears in this movie, the zombie has evolve too much that they can use guns, and knife, and can swim!!... well the end of the movie is the zombie took over the city of the last surviving people, and the people, i think, went to Alaska or something... of course with the cool anti-zombie vehicle, or AZV.

Between these 2 movies, i cant really decide.... because both are awesome... but because i really do think i have to choose, i'll choose, RESIDENT EVIL. because i can actually be part of the zombie killing action team, by playing the game. my actual thought while watching the movie is to kill as much zombies as you can.... my mind is twisted, but its much better than me imagining killing real people, right? or even killing small furry animal just for the sake of fun... i'm not sadistic or anything, its just killing return from the dead guys are much cooler, and they dont try to stop you if you kill it. heheheheheh....

"there's a place off ocean avenue, where i used to sit and talk with you, we were both sixteen and it felt so right, sleeping all day staying up all... night....staying up all night...."
Yellowcard-Ocean Avenue

Do i really want to know

2008-09-20T14:15:00.000-07:00

she's cute,
and she's sweet,
but she's too cocky...

she's smart,
and creative,
but she's a babe....

is this the girl that i've been looking for?
or is she just another crush meant to crush me later,
i'm lost for words when she's with me,
so i can't say for sure,
what she couldn't say to me,
but the very words i'm searching for,
she once said while asleep,
but i knew she meant it,
really she does,
and the rest about her
i just don't wanna know,
cause i love her so.....

could it be more boring or better after that...

2008-09-18T01:55:00.000-07:00

what more can you get when there's nothing to do.

no watching movies, no going out, busy with the assignments and other stuff..

but i've heard that some shows are coming back for a new season like SUPERNATURAL, HEROES, TERMINATOR:THE SARAH CONOR CHRONICLES, and the last one is CHUCK.

these are the shows that i've been looking forward to since the end of its last season....

hurray for september...

and this october, southpark will be airing its second half of season 12... more looking forward to that....

as final as my last fantasy...

2008-09-16T06:47:00.000-07:00

i'm obsessed with the final fantasy series, from the 7th game to the 10th game. all this ramadhan i've been playing the games again, except for final fantasy 8 which i didn't play(my brother played it) and final fantasy 9 which i dont really enjoy playing the second time.

Final Fantasy 7:
A dawn of new age for final fantasy, with feature such as ATB(active time battle), fully polygonal character, and pre-rendered background beutifully created especially for the game. i love the game, although the love story turns out to be a love triangle between Cloud, Aerith and Tifa, in the end, cloud ended up with tifa eventually after Aerith died. the 7th has its own series, which is FF7 Before Crisis, FF7 Crisis Core, FF7 Dirge of Cerberus and of course the FF7 sequel movie, Advent Children.

Final Fantasy 8:
one of the first game to actually have a character with normal proportion and the first series to actually have a voice in its soundtrack, (EYES ON ME, my favourite song, and listening now as i write). the story revolves around Squall and his friends after becoing SEEDS meeting Rinoa, trying to assasinate the Galbadian president, sent back in time to watch Laguna's past and killing some sorceress, and finally travelling to outer space.(two of which final fantasy to actually travel to space, one is Final Fantasy 7) the love story of a clod0hearted guy, with a spunky girl(one of the theme which is the same as the last final fantasy) happy ending, no girl dies except for Laguna's wife, which she wasn't killed by some antagonis, she died during childbirth. it didn't spawn any sequel, which is very boring, but no sequel is needed because it ends with a happy ending....

Final Fantasy 9:
a fantasy driven world, like the world of Final Fantasy before 7. i didn't like it too much, maybe becuase the character looks like kid, and very not proportional to anything. and the main character is a guy with tail, and the girl he loves is a princess who's mother is fat and evil, controlled by Kuja the protagonist supposedly older brother(both are actually created by some guy name Gathat actually has rland, who they call father) the game features a character in the game singing to a song, just like the previous title. the game ends happily because it was first thought that Zidane (the main protagonist of the game and not the football player) is dead because he stayes with Kuja at the end, but he is actually alive. the end shows that zidane revealed himself under the robe to Garnet(the character's love interest) and them embracing. it also show other happy scene such as, the queens bodyguard Steiner and Beatrix being together, Freya restarting her relationship with her boyfriend who apparently lost his memory, Eiko (a summoner too like Garnet) being adopted by Garnet's uncle Cid, Vivi apparently having children and Quina eating a whole lot of food. i don't really enjoyed the game because i didn't play it alone, i actually played it with 3 other people, my brother and my other 2 cousin, Mateen and Rudy.

Final Fantasy 10:
the first of the series to have the character with voice, and 3d rendered background instead of the old pre-rendered background. it start with Tidus re-telling the stories of how he ended up in Ruined Zanarkand. it tells the story love surpassed by time. the tale of summoner, guardians, Aeons, Fayth, Sin, fatherhood, friendship and love. Tidus is a star in a fictional sports named Blitzball. Yuna is a summoner, daughter of another summoner who fought the last Sin and brought the temporary calm who's guardian turned out to be Tidus's father and the present Sin. because Tidus loves Yuna, he won't let her die just for a temporary Calm, but instead find a way to actually kill Sin permenantly, without having to sacrifice Yuna's life or even Tidus's life. in the end, Sin is killed with the help of Yuna's Uncle Cid's Machina to enter Sin, and destroy it from the insie by killing the possesed Aeon that is present inside Sin, and finally Tidus killing his own father(his father wanted him to kill him to prevent the cycle of sin to continue) so after Sin dies, Tidus disappears with Sin, and Auron. leaving Yuna alone to be the last high summoner to stop Sin and brong forth the eternal Calm. it may sound like a sad ending, but the game actually has a sequel known as FF X-2.

Final fantasy 10-2:
the game continues after the first game. Yuna is famous because she stopped Sin. she's famous but not happy, as the man she loves is not there(note that Tidus is not dead) so while one day Yuna was doing what she always do at Besaid island, Rikku came to see her. Rikku along with her brother known as Brotherhas establish themselves as sphere hunters, that goesaround the world hunting sphere. anyway, Rikku came to Yuna bringing her a sphere that Kimahri found at mount Gagazet. the sphere shows a guy that looks similarly like tidus but not quite him, inside a cage. so this was where her adventure began, she left her post as the famous high summoner and joined Rikku's sphere hunting group known as the gullwings. she ditched her summoner attire and switched to a more revealling clothes that resembles Tidus's clothes in the previous game. so it went along she found other sphere, and got into other adventures, and finally found out that the guy in the sphere wasn't tidus, but actually Shuyin, another guy from zanarkand too but in a different ERA. he and his love Lenne died together but he never heard the last word that Lenne said to him, which was "i love you" he didn't heard it because he died. so his spirit was in grief over not hearing her said i love you to him one last time, and eventually his grief turned to anger and his spirit bonded with the pyreflies and formed another image of him(kinda like a spirit form) and possesed this guy called Baralai. he was plannig to use the ultimate weapon called vegnagun to destroy the world because he believed by destroying the world, the world would vanish along with him and ended his misery. but eventually Yuna and the gang destroyed vegnagun, and beated Shuyin. but of course he wasn't dead yet. so the spirit of Lenne actually came through and ended the grief that has taken over Shuyin all this time. he found out that she had always loved him and such. finally both vanished together. the ending depends on what the player did, if they haven't done a certain thing then they won't get the ultra-mega happy ending and eventually the ultimate perfect ending. the normal ending is Yuna finding out that Tidus is always in her heart no matter where he was, and she could always meet with him at the farplane. the ultra-mega happy ending is that the fayth of Bahamut, asked Yuna if she wanted to meet him again, she answered yes, so the fayth gathered up Tidus's memory within the farplane and combined it with his pyreflies thus making tidus reborn again, ashinted in the ending of FF10. Tidus wakes up underwater, like he did when he first arrived at Besaid Island. he swam up and noticed that it was the Beach in front of Besaid island.he swam to the shore and saw Yuna's airship landing near the water. Yuna ran out of the ship and embraces him like she never embraced him before. so the ending to this ending, is Tidus telling Yuna, "you've change."
Yuna:"well a lot has happened while you were gone"
Tidus:"well tell me everything about it"
Yuna:"well it all started when i saw this sphere of you..."
that was the ending to the ultra-mega happy ending . if you finished the game asecond time reaching 100%, you can get the reunion Yuna had with Tidus at the Zanarkand ruins. the most beutifully done story.... i really love this game....

this ends the sum of Final fantasy which i had played and really enjoyed all this time. all in all, i guess most tells the story of a certain group stopping some big evil forces, and finding love along the way, while having you're friend by your side to help you out. i've tried playing FF12 but the game doesn't connect to me in any way, maybe because of the name of the character, Vahn or maybe because of the storyline, but its not very enjoyable to me. so i'm kinda waiting for final fantasy 13 which is gonna gonna come out in the PS3, next year. so by next year i should at least own a PS3 or an X-box 360 to play the game....

"i'm haunted by this photograph, i don't know why, everytime i look, i get shivers down my spine, you've such a beautiful face, i know those eyes, they take me back in time...."
Shawn Hlookoff- She could be You

JAM PASSION

2008-09-14T14:41:00.000-07:00

due to the recently boring nature of my life this last few weeks, meaning that i have done absolutely nothing, and maybe if i did something it wasn't blog-worthy... now i'm going to go through my passion for jamming....

here are the chronicles of tha places that i have went to jam these pass times.....

1- Les Paul Saberkas
first time jamming. the rooms are quite small, but the drums are well and finely tuned unlike some other places that i know of. there are 2 rooms, make sure to choose the second room(the left one) that has this amazing drums, the other room when i used to jam here had this shaky drum. it wan't very pleasan to play with shaky drums so me and my cousin moved to the other room.
Price=RM20 per hour (most noted price here in Kuching)

2- HMI or IMH at Sukma
one of those places where i could go to after school. using your own motorcycles to school really rocks especially when you need to go jamming afterwards. the place was still new when me and my classmates went there,i dont know the conditionnow...and though some really terrible thing happened there this one time(one of my friends motorcycles was stolen here, Hapiz pun) we still enjoyed the time there.
Price=RM20 (when i first jammed here, but now i think its 25 or less i dont know)

3- Audiowave music house at Satok
the place that me, pdoz, pdoy, izat and arkam went to between tuition class, before BM cekgu Roslan. the probably most popular jamming place for TUNAZ's hostel student and a few other schools too. they used to be inside the Satok building before they renovate. inside the building, they have 2 rooms, but after they move out into that place above SCR foodcourt, they only have one room, but with the most finest equipment you can find.
Price=RM30 (most suitable if you are going into battle of the band or forming your own band.)

4- BNB music
probably one of the most place that i go to everyweek since graduating highschool. they only have one room, but with soundproof glasses and music sheets holder.at one point i really enjoyed this place but as times moves on, and more people used it, the instruments become worn down, and more damage than you can get from an accident.the drums are really out of tuned now, the hi hats are inverted the guitar are rusted and dusty. they are now closing the jamming place because of the damage to their instrument. i think its a good idea too.
Price=used to be RM18 for Duo and RM20 for Band

5- Flinstone jamming studio
bet most dont know that flintstone has opened their own jamming studio, but in case you do know, than forget i mention the first line. they have 2 rooms, i've only been in one room, which was pretty rock-based decoration. the walls are made from something painted with dark colours. thats about it, i don't know much about the place yet, just been there once only. they sell t-shirts and cd too there. and they do showcase, like their shop in the satok building, some band playing on the TV.
Price=RM20-RM25

there are probably more places in Kuching to jam but i'm still hunting for it. so if any of you guys out there know any, tell me where the location is.

and the places that i know of,but haven't gone to yet is, groove republic, that place in BDC, and Ala carte(medan pelita)...

"We passed upon the stair, we spoke in was and when,Although I wasn't there, he said I was his friend, Which came as a surprise, I spoke into his eyes,i thought you died alone... along long time ago....oh no.. not me..we never lost control, you're face to face with the MAN WHO SOLD THE WORLD"
Nirvana cover Dsvid Bowie- The Man Who sold the world (Yes this is a David Bowie Song, covered by Nirvana)

think about what you did......

2008-09-09T19:26:00.000-07:00

Superior Complex......

i think i have this problem....

don't know what it means, but i don't think its good....

ramadhan, and so on...

2008-08-31T06:07:00.000-07:00

it was announced a few minutes ago, that the fasting month was to start tomorrow, which has just worsen my week. first worst thing, i can't go out yesterday at night for some strange reason. i dont get to see the girl that i was hoping to like. and my dad was admitted to the hospital because of hypertension. this was a very crappy week for me. plus i haven't even finished my assignment which was due next week, tomorrow. so in the morning i must finished it. i must.

the weekends really sucked. the weather keeps turning bad, i kept getting scolded by my mother for no apparent reason,. and for once on my whole seventeen years living, i didn't get to celebrate the independence day.which i kinda admit was lame of me to miss it. each and every year i would somehow find a way to celebrate it. like last year, i didn't quite remember it, but i went out with someone and saw the parade and the fireworks, and the hot girls. and the year before that, i slept at the midnight celebration, but i was in one of the parade. and the year before that was with rudy. so this year i dont feel the heat anymore. nothing feels right about this whole year. i turned seventeen, but i didn't feel like it, i met some hot girls earlier this year and still not feeling it, and Raya is about a month away, and i dont feel like celebrating Raya, most probabl because most of my friends are not here, even my family is not here. if i were to live a long life, i would probably labeled this year as the most boring year of my life. plus i'm still treated like a kid. i cant go anywhere. when my brother finished highschool, my mother bought him a car, and he went out like crazy. and me, i dont get a car, i dont get to go out, and i still get yelled at for no apparent reason.i still cant go out because each and every week, there will always be some kind of excuses. and i am afraid of having a girlfriend relationship with any girl.
if i go meet a shrink, i would most probably be classified as having issues with relationship. i dont, its just that i havent met the right girl.

the right girl for me:
1-kind and caring(obvious answer)
2-funny and can understand my kind of jokes
3-can understand it when i talk games with her
4-likes the music that i like
5-not so bitchy
6-not that choosy
7-have a really cute laugh and smile
8-likes long distant car rides and motorcycle rides
9-isn't too trendy
10-enjoy watching movies and criticizing and making fun of lame movies

this kind of traits isn't that hard to find, but they dont come in the whole package, they come in little package, like number 1 and number 3. or 1,2,3,5,6,9. or even 1,2,3,4,5.. and such... i'm sure hoping to find the girl if i search hard and long and really carefully. but with the way things are going with me, i dont even know if its even gonna come true.

i'm really hoping to find the girl, and i just hope i find her soon, since i'm starting to lose my will to live. now my only goal is to become the next steven spielberg, or ahmad idham, or aziz m osman. i'm searching for some other aspiration to pursue, and i hope i can find the girl, or if there are any girl reading this post out there that thinks that they fill the right girl criteria, well leave a comment and i'll let you know.

"first comes heavy breathing, staring at the ceiling, what will happen next i dont wanna know..."
New Found Glory-I Dont Wanna Know

but its better if you do.... and probably the best if you dont

2008-08-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

masquarade ball.... i dont have any experience with these kind of things, most probably because i dont ever feel like going to those kinds of event... EVER.... maybe because of the couple thing, or maybe its because of the age difference, or maybe i'm just not the socialite kind that goes to those things.... but according to the lecturer it is compulsary to all students to go.. still its not for me, and it never will. if i have a date i might consider going, yeah.. and monkeys might fly out of my butts(waynes world tribute)........

so in any case if they even force me to go, i would probably just sit in my car and wait for a few hours then leave .... and to just prepare for the worst i have prepared a few mask for the ball....

the silver man.... seriously though, it took me hours to make the mask, and i have no intention to decorate it. and there is another one

its the same mask, i just turned it upside down, and added a little mouth to the bottom part... and if i'm feeling a wee bit halloween spirit, there's the big jack-o-lantern mask....

the jack-o-lantern thing(rudy's mask) the scary mask that gave some of my friends nightmare at school, kidding, and then theres the whole green leaf on top of the head that annoys me......

the burn victim look...or as i name it Knife point.....heheheh... whatever decision i made tomorrow, i am prepared....

and did i mention that this saturday will either be a happy day or sad day for me, or just another saturday ...... i'll update after the whole things happens... or maybe tomorrow if i have time.....

"wandering the street with the world underneath it all... nothing seems to be, nothing taste as sweet as what i can have..... like you and the was as you twisting your hair round your finger..... tonight i'm going tell you, what i feel about you..." Teddy Geiger-For You I Will(confidence)

MR. Sandman

2008-08-18T21:09:00.000-07:00

Mister Sandman, bring me a dream
Make her cutest that I've ever seen
Give her two lips like roses in clover
Then tell her that her lonesome nights are over

Mister Sandman,
I'm so aloneDon't have nobody to call my own
Please turn on your magic beam
Mister Sandman, bring me a dream

Mister Sandman, bring me a dream
Make her cutest that I've ever seen
Give her the word that I'm not a rover
Then tell her that her lonesome nights are over

Mister Sandman, I'm so alone
Don't have nobody to call my own
Please turn on your magic beam
Mister Sandman, bring me a dream

Mister Sandman, bring us a dream
Give her a pair of eyes with a congeal of gleam
Give her a lonely heart like Harlehatschi
And not so wavy hair like Liberachi

Mister Sandman, someone to hold
Would be so peachy before we're to old
So please turn on your magic beam
Mister Sandman, brings us
Please, please, please

Mister Sandman
Bring us a dream

the aftermath, the end... and the starting...

2008-08-18T04:24:00.000-07:00

Limkokwing class started last week. it was a busy week for me and my whole family. there was this weeding of my aunt( my mom's cousin) wedding. it took about three days to finish, the first day, friday, the akad nikah. then saturday, the wedding reception, and Sunday the thank you party .

but wait there's more. that sunday was also the day of my newborn cousin's makan Selamat. that was probably what last week was all about.

in every family there's always this rich family thats somehow connected to us. there are some from my mother's side. they are my second cousin. they are filthy rich and live in this big house, and i never seem to connect with them. probably the main reason because the dont seem to remember me at all. they remember everyone else in my family but not me and my brothers. it was kinda, how should i put it, weird that they dont know family. so i was like whatever, and i didn't care. when they saw me, i knew that they looked right throuht me like i'm invisible or something. it wasn't a really big deal but i never seem to connect with them at all. when we were kids, my mom would inrodused us as second cousin because we need to know our family. they would of course acknowledge my existense for once, and they would try and have a conversation with me. and the next few years we dont see each others and they forgot about us already. how could they forget about us, i didn't forget them. and the next again we met, and this time our mom introdused us again, just in case we forgot who we were. and so our existense are once again acknowledge. but then again of course the whole process starts again. forgetting, introducing, and acknowledging and such.

and do you ever meet with rich kids? they're favourite line is " i may be rich but i can talk with everyone. i'm humble."
as if. i've been with rich kids that are like that. they say they can talk with everyone, and i agree they can, but they dont hang out with everyone. but dont worry this has nothing to do with anyone that i know, NOT!

"Kabus malam tanpa bulan bintang seribu satu kisah lenggang lenggok mu... figura hatiku!!"
THE TIMES-Konfrantasi primadonna 1965

a mind set..a film touched...a new life.. a new prespective

2008-08-13T05:42:00.000-07:00

malaysian film can be quite boring and yet again i see them to support the local scene. but the whole idea of following up-to-date movie such as the drift racing movies, is so not good. i want the malaysian film industry to come up with their own movie ideas, instead of following the flow of interest in that time. i mean come on, have a more better idea than following the fast and furious movies 'Tokyo Drfit' and turning it into something like 'KL Drift'. some people really liked this kind of movie, but that doesn't mean the whole of malaysia liked it. some will think that its a cheap ripoff of the Tokyo Drift. why not come up with something original like the one show that i respect because it can comeup with its own title, Impak Maksima(although the term Maksima doesn't exist in the malay dictionary, the term Maksimum is more appropriate). and another reason i respect it is because it can grow into a tv series. that is what i want from malaysian film makers, to make your movies original, without following the trend, and if you can come up with better plot, make it into a tv series. and come out with new genres for god sake. never ever go for the same thing over and over again, the rotations of love stories, and comedies, or romantic comedies, and suffering romantic comedy. the new genres introduced in these 2-3 years are scary movies, and racing movies. why not come with sci-fi, or action, or even those independence movies.

TV are a really good media. the medium can send a message to the whole world. but in particular in malaysia. the whole TV series is kinda, well i wouldn't call it a joke but... its not that interesting. the series they make is usually about life drama. as if our life is not filled with drama as it is. dramas are interesting to watch but it doesn't open our mind. with the introducing of ASTRO to our tv sets at home, we may never tune in to local tv station that much anymore, we may prefer to watch western tv shows. i on the other hand much prefer the local stations since my room doesn't have ASTRO, but its not the only reason, the other one is because the show are mostly repeats everyday. they repeat the same shows everyday, and only change weekly. so instead i watch the local stations because they dont have repeats, except maybe for the late night slot which i can assure nobody really watches except for those insomniac person.

one tv shows genre that i know i like is the new horror tv series Kekasihku Seru. those thursday nights slot are really interesting to watch because it shows the ghostly other-worldly that of our culture. the power of a human being that is able to see these superntural being and some are capable of destroying them.

another tv shows that i like is KAMI the tv series. it focuses on 4 teens. when i first saw this show, i was like " Finally malaysia's own teen dramas". i liked the whole tv series mainly because it focuses on teenagers, and how they deal with life, one a recovering drug addict, one a poor ex-drug dealer, one a kleptomaniac misunderstood kid who was never seen as anything to his parents eyes , one a girl that falls in love in the internet, and one uptight girl that doesn't listen to reason and likes boys a little too much. but one thing that all these kids have in common is that they all listen to indie music, and are connected by this fanzine made by the ex drug dealer called KAMI. that is how the shows got its name. but one thing about this show that i didn't like is the fact that it uses the same scene over and over again, but from a different person point of view. they could have used the scene in one episode only and continue on with another plot, without involving the same scene from another's view. the shows so far has one season, and i really hoped it will continue on for another season, and a rumor going on is that KAMI the Movie is in the making. cant wait for it. plus the show introduced malaysia to the world of indie music, which is quite sad actually. before nobody knew of the band Meet uncle hussein, the times couple, and other bands. the now going on tour is the KAMI the GIG, featuring Meet uncle hussien and all its patrons.

Film industry in malaysia really need to boost their taste and their ideas to actually make it to the same level as those in the UK or the US. so goodluck malaysia...

"terjatuh bangun semula, panic di Kuala Lumpur"
The Times-Panic! di Kuala Lumpur

to the love i left my conscience pressed through the keyhole I watched you dress,

2008-07-21T09:39:00.000-07:00

ooh... ouch... oweh.....

the very words that i constantly heard this week. there has been many accidents happening around me. my cousin's boyfriend, my friend, some of my neighbour, and a few guys that i happen to meet at the accident site. it's like a feeling that I'm about to be involve with those things.. but i won't keep my hopes on being in an accident, because primarily, if I'm in an accident, i wont get to drive again. accidents using motorcycles is alright, since no one knows about it but me, but if I'm using the car, the scratches could be very noticeable. plus when i drive i may not be alone. my brother could be with me. and he always tells my mother what i do. which is the opposite of me. whenever he does things i wont tell anybody, not even my friend. least to say about the accidents that he was in, nothing serious really, but bumping into a car in the parking lot, or even the incident when he was at the roundabout.

whatever he's done I'll keep it a secret.

and my other brother. the oldest one. could be the most one that i have most in common with but never that close. he likes to buy things that are really expensive, and have this tendency to not let anyone use it, especially me..... things like, wax, earphone, food, his phone, and other things. but when it comes to using my stuff, well lets just say boundaries can be reached.

case number 1
-using my mouthwash. he thinks i don't know. how do you explain my newly-purchased Listerine is gone within one week after i bought it...

case number 2
-using my laptop without my concern. lets just say my laptop has a sing in time. how can i log in to my laptop when I'm out jamming:?

there area lot more case that i can present, but since they are my brother, i couldn't do anything about it. plus nobody would believe me anyway.... I'm like the black sheep of the family..

that's about my brother..

now about the rest of my family...
there are 2 sides in any family, one is the father's side, and the other is the mother's side, of course.

my father's side:
-they are humble people. mostly one that sticks to tradition(their parent of course,and their kids tend to follow but with a modern twist) almost all of them knows me, and they are familiar with me rather than my brother. plus they all know my name, and know my father. i really like going to this side whenever there are any function. and by the way, this side is really rich, but they do not show it, even in the way they dress

my mother's side:
-one that i used to like when i was a kid(mostly because my grandfather was still alive,god rest his soul) now after my grandfather passed away, i hate them. maybe its because of their behaviour, although they are funny, but its just that they are a little bit harsh. most of them are a bit too shallow. i mean come on what kind of a kid can only hangout with a another kid that are very rich. even their kid's girlfriends-boyfriends are rich... and because i never bring my girlfriend home, i am somewhat of an outsider to them. and they even judge people before they even know them. i mean i used to have this girlfriend that live somewhere, and they made fun of her just because she lived there. plus many of the people on this side don't even know me. i mean what kind of a family member puts you outside at a family function just because you don't know them, only to put you back into the house after they've met your mother. really that really pisses me off. it happened when i was with my brother. and one main thing is the one that knows me usually only makes fun of me. and the choice of work that i chose isn't to their liking, while on my father's side, they are really supportive of what i choose.

both family sides have their own chosen work fields

Father's side
-what you like to be, and mostly accountants. proud for what you do

mother's side
-the scientific side, mostly engineers, doctors. those who do not meet the requirements(like me) are outcast, even by my mother. i mean, last raya, i went to my grand-aunt(my grandfather's sister) and when i said i was going to be a director(movie director, no the company director) my mother said it was a silly ambition. so what, I've wanted to be that since i was a kid. and she said i was silly, and the respond from my grand-aunt was, a new field to be broken into. i was lucky she said that.

mother's side
most of the talks when my family are presents are of my brothers only. they never talk about me. i just finished my first semester in limkokwing but no one talked about that. my brother just received a letter to proceed into medicine was talked about all year long, even before he accepted it. it seems that i wasn't there. i am invisible. not there not anywhere. and i intend not to be there.

my reasons for posting this post today was because within a few weeks, my mother's cousin, is getting married. the function was two days, one at the my mom's cousin's house, and the second one, is at crown plaza(riverside hotel) i have stated that i didn't want to go, but she insisted that i go, since if i dont go they wont come to our families function if we had any. i wont elaborate any further but lets just say, whenever we have any family function, its always the same ones that come. i never see anyone else come, even on my grandfather's anniversary of his death(known as makan howl/hole/hoel whatever) mostly that comes is his friend. and close relatives(the first cousins, uncles, aunts, grand aunts/uncle)

so i have struck a deal with my mother, i will only go on one day only, which is at the house. and the on;y reason i wanted to go is because my gay cousin(Azzra) insisted to his father that we perform a song at the reception. one song that is"when you look me in the eyes" by the Jonas brothers. i first voted for"i don't love you" by my chemical romance but it just doesn't fit the whole wedding concept, but i think it does.so it has been decided. when you look me in the eyes. and one more thing, my newborn cousin's baby shower or known here as 'makan selamat' will be held also. so I'm in charge of taking photos and videos, and performing some show tunes which i really think wont happen, since they have no other things to use as an instrument other than our electric guitar. a talk of renting drums was rumored but hearing the price of renting the whole set for rm2000, well lets just save the money for buying drums rather than renting them. and for performance, i bet it will be another karaoke and sing-along. .....I'd rather stay somewhere else....so that's why after i graduate, i was thinking of running away from this place, from my family. i really wont miss them, or this place. I've been humiliated and harassed by this place for too long. and they always say that after parting with your family, you'll realize how important they are to you, but i never felt that. even when i went camping at school, or went to kl, or sleep somewhere other that here. i felt i don't wanna go home. my second older brother was thinking of doing just that after completing his doctor things.....go somewhere far from here.

"Don’t you know that I could see That you’re not afraid of dying Don’t you know that I could see There is not much use for crying"-now that i can see by Couples

from here to there and everywhere...

2008-07-19T09:02:00.000-07:00

one more week, and it will end... my vacation, my holiday...1 month... still i haven't achieved anything. and as my life goes on.. i felt that i haven't done anything litterally for one month but sit in my house playing PS2, watching tv, playing computer, watching movies once in a while, going out on my own (which is quite boring, nobody with me at all) and some other unimportant stuff. my main goal during this break was actually to enhace my photography abilities. which thanks to my dad, i didn't do. mainly because i had this old-skool professional camera(CANON) and it needs a new battery. since my dad promised to buy it, i never thought to buy it myself. and for a whole 3 weeks he didn't get on the job. and he's the one that keeps lecturing me about not doing my job very well... thats a little bit hypocrite really, but i couldn't care.. he never remeber things like this, eventhough i remind him everyday.....

one more week, and Naim will come here, for his summer break. and coaccording to my dad, he may be staying with us. at least there's someone to play PS2 with me.

" i think of yesterdayand all the times I spent being lonely I watched the young be young While all the singers sung about the way I felt "
McFly-The Way You Make Me Feel

us against us......what the heck?

2008-07-09T03:15:00.001-07:00

recently, our country is against stormed by an outlet of political outburst concerning false accusation, sodomy, and murder... this is the kicks of our country, this is the issue that is heating up in this nation of Malaysia.. even I'm embarrassed by this situation..

they should really stop feuding against each other and start joining mind to face the international crisis, that is that is the increasing value of oil, the low count of food storage, and such.. its such a senseless crime, they are politicians, these scandal shouldn't happen, they should face the nation's problem not their own.. and i blame the media for heating up the argument between them... they're not actors or actress, they're politicians, and these thing should really stop.... really..it should...

i look like buddy holly, you're mary tyler moore

2008-07-09T02:40:00.000-07:00

this week on my "to-DO" list is still nothing.. still got enough cash to last me two maybe three more weeks. naim isn't coming untill the 27.. and i'm still bored out of my wits. and to further my torment, college will start soon.. and i dont even know if the finals result are posted yet.. gosh darn it..

so in the midst of noithingness, i fill my time by playing the ps2, which is starting to feel rather dull, and on the side i'm kinda saving to buy myself the PS3 until i found out that the PS3 requires a thing called an HDTV screen or monitor..and my dreams went down the drain, so instead i think i'm gonna buy a thing called the X-box 360, and that is until another shocking revelation, there isn't that many game published for the x-box. plus i dont think that many people in kuching own an X-box, so if i do buy it, i'm guessing it will be just another single player fun, since a lot of the x-box games are online multiplayer capable, since it is built by microsoft, and the internet, i can use my lan to connect it... so all in all, i'll just save to buy the PS3, and for the HDTV, i think until i work.....

and by the looks of it, there is nothing more i can do, since there is no one to go out with... my friends are all either in UITM or KML... that really sucks, and plus the night i get to go out with them is saturday, that is if my friends are back, if not then i'll go out with my brother, or in the day i'd go with my cousin "GAY-TING" Azzra.. i know its gay to be talking about him...

but on the bright side i get to hang out with more girls, since the departure of my friends.. cinema, eat out, or just hanging at her house..we're getting more closer, but i don't think i want to be her boyfriend, because i dont beleive in the very sense of being boyfriend-girlfriend.. we could become that, but then there's the calling everyday routine, and buying things for her, and notifying her if i'm going anywhere or hanging with anyone.. whatever.. the informal thing is much better.. i'll keep the relationship called friends-Plus-plus...and because i dont want the whole boyfriend-girlfriend is because if that is the case, i couldn't go out with other girl.. and if she does catches me or something, we couldn't break up because we aren't a "thing"(i mean boyfriend-girlfriend) i'm such a genius, but i sure hope she doesn't read this, or catch me or anything, because even if i dont get dumped, i'd probably get beat up or worse...(and not the good kind of beating anyway...)

well that is probably all my post for today... it isn't that long and i haven't posted in a while, but whatever..whatever.. i'd do what i want...(CArtman)

"where is your boy tonight i hope he is a gentleman, maybe he won't find out what i know, you are the last good thing about this part of town..."
Fall Out Boy-Grand Theft Autumn

living on the run driving in the sun..... looking out for number one

2008-06-29T20:26:00.000-07:00

i woke up and after showering, find myself watching a movie called, Just friend, starring Ryan Reynolds, Amy Smart, and Anna Faris. the movie has a really great theme to it. the nice guy turned jackass coming back to his hometown, and hitting on his old bestfriend, but found it hard to bang her because in the end he found out he really loved her, all along, he didn't want revenge on her for putting him in the friend zone all this time.

since i've put the title to this post with part of a song by Phantom Planet, which is the theme song to drama series The O.C.... so in the glory of the film that is themed with love and despair and sarcasm and irony...

love. thats right i'll write about this again.

in movies or tv series, there would always be a guy that likes a popular girl, but the popular girl always have a boyfriend that is maybe a jock, a jackass, or a rich jerk-jackass.

well in real life, i'm not sure the condition in the US, but in my own hometown,things like this exist. lets just make an example, there is this guy, who really liked this pretty girl. but the girl has a boyfriend, and the boyfriend is a total jackass. i'm not quite sure what she sees in him, eventhough he haa goodlooking face. the boyfriend also turns out to be a pothead. there is nothing unsual with these situation, but it always happens. and the guy that likes the girl, is actually a nice guy, he's a straight A student, and he's just simply a nice guy.

too bad for the girl though after the end of secondary school, her boyfriend got arrested for illegal racing. she broke up with him, and went on to find another jackass. isn't it just laughable?....and by the way the guy went to college, and became an engineer.

ain't it a shame?.....

the equation is,
pretty girls + jackass = love
smart nice guy + pretty girls = syntax error

that about sums it up....

long live and shattered heads

2008-06-21T05:17:00.000-07:00

three days.... my fathers said he would be gone for three days, and because of that...i'm responsible for the store, i'm taking care of the place, in charge of the money and all...

anyway... friday, my father went in the morning, really early, like 4 in the morning early, and so i went to the store early, and like brought my laptop too... the entire morning i played DIABLO 2 Lord Of Destruction, until i finished act 4 which is kill the lord of teror, Diablo... then i played the expansion act, act 5.. killing Baal.

then saturday, well i played solitaire, such a pain playing that game repeating and repeating... untill the time was about 12... then i stopped playing...

and since i've been hanging out at the store, i found out that my cousin Naim from the UK is coming this July... good news, since he's coming, so i have someone to hangout with, but the downside is, he's just 13 or 14... somewhere around that age, and he hasn't shown any sign of interest over girls, so i'm kinda screwed, then again we would always hangout play PS2, or he played my PS2 and i played his PSP, its a fair trade........so i just hope it will be quick....

and since its the semester break for me, i'm still thinking of something to write about in my blog, and since i've recently found out that by sending some creative picture to a public newspaper, you get like rm50 or rm100.... something like that.... so now i'm busy fixing my camera,( a really old Canon camera) its a classic professional camera.... so with it, i can take good picture and i can like send it to the newspaper and it will be easy money.....

"because i've been so out of order, yes i have babe... my new found love showed up and blew her out the water..."
McFly - The guy who Turned Her Down

nice....

2008-06-20T06:44:00.000-07:00

lets just say, i've met this girl... and she's ...nice...

ow right....

hehehehe

she's also cute, very frendly... and very2 nice....

cant wait to see her again....

LAST minute POST before FINALS

2008-06-10T04:26:00.000-07:00

HAHAHAHA

i haven't studied for the exam.....
now i think i'll fail.
too much to handle...

eeekkk....the scary thriling truth

2008-06-07T20:25:00.000-07:00

scary movies, thriller movies now has been a really weird trend... especially in the US, they tend to do a remake of old movies, or remake of asian horror film, like the Ring,(RINGU), Dark water, shutter, and etc....and in asia they tend to make horror movies based on ordinary object like the ring, chelo, congkak?, and shutter( basicly all i've stated is just asian horror film, and their remake into US film...) and by the way, Shutters is actually a Thai Film, not Japan...

well i've been wondering, why do they make these new horror film from ordinary object, i miss those good old days when they would make horror movies based on the names of their ghost like Freddy Cruger, or Jason, or Halloween, ginger snaps, day of the dead, dawn of the dead, and the whole "DEAD" series and such....

Ringu ,it should really have a connection with lord of the ring, so the title should be,
My Version: Ringu:legend of the ring...and the main antagonist is Sadako and sauron, they team up up to kill frodo and the gang, with one more girl added to their fellowship(the girl haunted by Sadako, or Samara in the Us version) and the Ring of Sauron contains the video where Sadako/Samara is in, the random video)

and shutter, in case no one knows what a shutter is, its the one inside the camera, that captures the image...so this is it..
my version: it is a promotion video made by Cannon. their camera are so good that it can actually capture a ghostly picture. Ghost not included into shutter, and result of picture may vary according to place and light.

and the malaysian horror film called congkak.....its actually a tradisional game....
wats scary about this...
My Version: when a kid wants to play Congkak by themselves, someone else is playing with them, its... the new Harpbrow Congkak play-by-yourself. its computerized to play with you when you're playing with yourself(not playing with yourself, but by yourself). batteries and computer not included....

and since i want to avoid lawsuit, i'm not gonna do anymore picture from the internet....i'll use some from my private collection...

so in the case if i'm making my own horror film, i have a few in mind...
The Chair:

the stories go there is a haunted chair in house.....

the remote control:

everytime we use the remote control, the battery is used little by little, what if your remote control is powered by other worldly power, it can really be a nightmare...

and of course,
the orange mug:

one day you wake up to find your mug broken, so you go to the nearest mug store, and you find this interesting orange coloured mug, so you buy it... with out knowing that the mug was used by a witchdoctor to collect blood, and it was used to kill 100 people during the second world war, and some guy pissed in it a couple of minute ago........

if this film is a real hit in the cinema, then seriously, people watching this movie either have no sense of movie watching,or they are just watching so they can make out with their girlfriend/boyfriend.........

"to tell you the truth, i didn't want this thing to happen while you were away..."
O@G, Wired

heads up!

2008-06-04T20:20:00.000-07:00

just posting to say, "ridwan dah pande polah lawak"

"(fake laugh) hahaha"
"(more fake laugh) hahahahaha"

somewhere called the INTERNET

2008-06-03T22:20:00.000-07:00

the internet, is a really big place. it is a place where information can be accessed through one click of a button. well thats the opinion of what a good highschool kids would do, when they have homeworks, or to get somekind of info from the internet to complete the work that their teacher gave to them... and some more smarter kids, that can use the computer really well like they can play warcraft, or total war, or starcraft, or even stronghold, but not counter strikes(because a lot of people play that game and the other game that i have mentioned is actually real time strategy) okay, and the more advance kids can actually go online and play online, or go to some cybercafe, and play LAN

well at some level, a kid with a dirty mind who cannot use a computer will try to look for porn from the internet, ametuerly, while a more advance dirtyminder(a term for horny kids that watch internet porn) can download the video they have found from the website so they can watch it over and over again, without having to go to the same site again and risking the discovery from their parent.

now the thing that i am using now is called a blog, jus in case that some may not know, and this can probably be the most powerful thing, most funniest thing, most serious thing, and most controversial thing, as in the case of malaysia today blogger, Raja Petra being arrested with charges of Sedition. well i would want to talk more about him, because some guy reading my blog could actually report me to the police and arrest me for writing,...... in the internet...... where lies and deception takes place..... okay.....back to my story.... so the blog like i said is a trend nowadays, eveerybody has a blog....and the bloggers are sometimes so serious about their blog, that even when someone is joking, he really takes it seriously... and i have this experience, where i left a comment on a certain someone's blog where i was just clearly joking about the term copycat, which i turn into cofee-cat and other words that came from the top of my hat, and i said the post ended with being a copycat.. well he fell in rage....why?...... i dont know why...... maybe he's just an uptight guy, that cannot take some kind of joke.... and of course i ended my comment with saying "xda cta lain gik ka", and the comment that he replied back to me was "sukatikupunla...." well..... i dont think that was really mature for him, and i mean he talks so maturely on his blog... maybe some guy just couldn't process it, the kind of guy that takes everything seriously.

and whats with all the blog that some people post right, they have this wide usage of vocabulary, saying big words like 'alleged' or 'marginally proportional' or even 'largely appropriate'.......... using big words, can be really confusing, and when we read blogs, we don't actually want to bring an uberly awesome large book of internet jargins or even a dictionary with us.. when we're on the internet..... and please don talk to me using sir or mr. 'whatever'.... i really hate that, its like i have somekind of ranks, and if somepeople didn't know.. Sir is given to a really famous person or someone in the army or someone who has done something really good to the world, and is given to the said person by the Queen of England. and if people start calling me that i might have to go to England to request the ranks from the Queen.... yea, and student at school call their male teacher, SIR,really..... i never called any of my teacher SIR, i called them by their name with the added MR. at the front....or CIKGU.....

and a few weeks ago i wrote a post that had many comment from the girls friend..... and i mainly got ripped because i used the term "SLUT", "WHORE",and "BITCH".... well i didn't used the term to describe the girl, but some other girl from my past.........i don't want to go here again so i'll end the post now....

okay... and by the way don ever PIMP your blogs with stupid things, and colourful wallpaper or even picture. and if u do intend to have songs in your blog, dont put it to play automaticly, cause at time it can cause someone to be startled and fall , or for someone that has a heart condition can die from it......seriously.... and don put copyrighted picture in your blogs, people can sometime file a lawsuit agains you, or even tell you a poser.......

a poser is somewhat of a copycat..... and if you try to copy someone, its a poser life, but if you copy their work its plagiarism(its a term used in univerties to prevent student from copying other's work.)..... and if you do ever be a poser, always acknowledge, where you got it from and thats enough, dont say anyhting else about poser...or copycat.... and i do know this is dedicated to one of my friend, thats right i do mean you @#$%^&*.......

"have you been up my wishing tree, its where i come to think and dream"
MR. Jefferson, SouthPark S8 Ep.07

i'm no longer

2008-06-02T23:07:00.000-07:00

god speed......final exam next week....... because i'm no longer, see you in a week times...... vote or die...... you wanna go and get high?....